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for Archomachy

4/28/2008 c10 6The Crazy Talk Kid
*standing ovation and applause applenty* Well done, well done. Your battle scenes were awesome and I njoyed your golems. Are they Mechs then? Also, I thought the Puppeteers were very creative.

4/21/2008 c9 JaveHarron
Talk about a hell of a way to start off the chapter! The Hands are becoming bolder, the military's holing up, and the place looks like it's about to go to hell in a handbasket. Hope to see a new chapter soon!
4/20/2008 c9 The Crazy Talk Kid
Very nicely done chapter. It would have been rather decimating if any of the leaders were killed. No glaring grammar errors so job well done. Kdh.
3/31/2008 c8 JaveHarron
So the political aspects get more relevant. So the Rangers would be attached like Delta Force or perhaps analogous to the FBI HRT or some similar group? Also, for the Templars, are they an in-house security force for the churches, or more like a neighborhood watch type organization?
3/26/2008 c8 The Crazy Talk Kid
That was a very intriguing chapter and a nicely done cliff hanger as well. I really enjoy this story. Kudos to you. Kdh.
3/7/2008 c7 The Crazy Talk Kid
There you go, that's what I meant. Better chapter and good job. Kdh.
3/6/2008 c7 JaveHarron
So the Hands of Auros have some ties to the smugglers, I guess? We'll see some action soon. It was nice to see some automata in action. So the ground attack airships may be analogous to an armed transport chopper loosely (like a Hind or Blackhawk)?
2/25/2008 c6 JaveHarron
I did enjoy the fight scene with the perspective jumping in between the two characters. The smugglers seem to be quite well armed. A mop up job seems long overdue. And thrown in is a religious fanatic (or at least one of several), to further complicate things. In other words, even more fun to follow.
2/24/2008 c6 The Crazy Talk Kid
Very good chapter though I would suggest that you try and mix it up a little more. Seems a wee bit stale at moments. Kdh.
2/18/2008 c5 The Crazy Talk Kid
I must admit that I very much enjoy this story from what I have read so far. The only suggestion I could make is to be a bit more descriptive about the surroundings of the story. Other than that it's pretty good. Kdh.
2/17/2008 c5 JaveHarron
About time we saw some more updates. And it's nice to finally see some combat for the Rangers. Are the ships they use powered by steam or ether or somesuch? Political backstabbing is always fun. I did enjoy the Air Force comment, though.
2/16/2008 c5 7Steampunk Champagne
Ah, well. Quite the story, I must say, and kudos for making it steampunk. I'm a punker myself, if you can't tell by the name :).

Although I noticed a few errors, mostly involving dropped words and similarly minor things, I'm quite impressed by your story so far. You manage to handle both extented time passage and frequent location switching without confusing me, which by itself is no minor feat, believe you me.

One of the things that bothered me, though, was your main character. I understand the idea that his background has made him something of a sociopath, but I find it hard to relate to a character who seldom expresses any thoughts or emotions, or who constantly expresses scorn for everyone around them without making any effort to communicate. But I'm a tad bit on the emotional side, so I might be letting my personal preferences get in the way of my advice here.

On the whole, though, I am very much intrigued. I'm especially fond of the sheer detail you've put into creating all the different cultures mentioned, and your knack of keeping everyone in character consistently through every scene quite frankly baffles me.

Do keep up the fabulous work, I'll be waiting breathlessly for updates.

-Steampunk Champagne
2/5/2008 c1 6The Crazy Talk Kid
Not such a bad start, a few errors but not so bad. It's caught my interest certainly. Kdh.
1/26/2008 c4 JaveHarron
Liking this story so far, though curious on a few things. What uses are certain melee weapons if the Rangers have CE muskets and other thaumechanical firearms? Why not just bayonets (even the long sword bayonets)? In real life, sword bayonets are brittle, heavy, and impractical, but throw in some thaumaturgical construction, and they're stronger. Also, how about Tyrre's tech when compared to rest of world (outside of the barbarians, at least)?
1/18/2008 c3 621Jave Harron
I'm enjoying this story so far. It's like Heinlein crossed with Mieville. Also, noticed a few grammatical things, like: "he lit them on fire on dropped them into latrines". Should be "(and) dropped them into latrines". Other than that, we have a psycho that wounded him, steampunk and thaumechanic bionics, and other fun stuff. A question, though. Isn't Tyrre the state he's already in? Either way, keep it up, and glad to see you continued this one.
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