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1/19/2008 c1 20Twilight Starr
Great job on describing feelings. Nice work.

~Twilight Starr~
1/14/2008 c1 43lookin4nemo
Again this is brilliant..i can't wait til i can put poems on my account u r so inspiring! ur on my fav authors list...
1/12/2008 c1 219Matthew James Current
I can see patches in this where the rhyme scheme flows very nicely, and you have a unique approach to articulating yourself in your work. My favorite part of this was "Your colors wash the monochrome / That makes up half my world" but that's because I love imagery :)

I can see that you are trying to get your feelings out, but seem to be struggling a bit with your stylistic approach. If all else fails, just keep writing and challenging yourself. With time, dedication, and patience, you will learn much not just about yourself and poetry, but you will also learn a lot about art in general ;)
1/9/2008 c1 bipolarjane
all d1s from jus 1 word? WOW!

luv da last l1n

"Torment is your delight" s0 w1ked

wh0s d1s laura pers0n u kep talk1n b0ut? she ur gf?

l0l wel h0p u guys hav a hapi relatinsh1p!

h0p ta here frm ya n kep writ1n n ru g0na b d0in n-e requests?
1/5/2008 c1 612simpleplan13
the whole greay thing is great and how someone can make it light is awesome
1/4/2008 c1 76Kaia Zeffirelli
Wow! Amazing. I love it! Also, I love your penname! But yeah- great rhyming and description- I especially like the lines: "I run through your fingers, Like unnoticed grains of sand" and "Your eyes are crude, they seek and twine".
1/4/2008 c1 82Billie.Joelle
Again, another amazing poem based off of only one word. Incredible. Good job
1/4/2008 c1 20Grey of Solitude
I love the last line 'Torment is your delight'. It's cool. What a big coincidence that it's grey like my name!

-Grey Jewel
1/4/2008 c1 2Blahzz
I loved the rhyme scheme and your use of adjectives and imagery. Well done!

~Raive

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