for without him?1/31/2008 c1 
332smile for the sunshine
we just learned about this in youth group last night but i don't think our pastor conveyed it well. i don't think he knows what it means to feel this way. but i do. and i think this was well expressed. i have so much empathy and most of my poetry are memories. for example, colors on the driveway is a poem about an actual event. i thought i was over what he did to me and over my dependancy but lately the memories just keep coming back. *sigh*
i am feeling this one today.
332smile for the sunshinewe just learned about this in youth group last night but i don't think our pastor conveyed it well. i don't think he knows what it means to feel this way. but i do. and i think this was well expressed. i have so much empathy and most of my poetry are memories. for example, colors on the driveway is a poem about an actual event. i thought i was over what he did to me and over my dependancy but lately the memories just keep coming back. *sigh*
i am feeling this one today.
1/17/2008 c1 612simpleplan13
I like the format.. especially emphasizing his whispers although I might omit the word his in the previous line because you did that... line "he kissed my soul" was really pwoerful.. awesome job
612simpleplan13I like the format.. especially emphasizing his whispers although I might omit the word his in the previous line because you did that... line "he kissed my soul" was really pwoerful.. awesome job
1/6/2008 c1 she smolders
There's so much pain expressed in the repeated "without him" - beautiful in its sadness.
I like this one a lot. Take care.
There's so much pain expressed in the repeated "without him" - beautiful in its sadness.
I like this one a lot. Take care.
1/6/2008 c1 46purple x pen
ouch! i can empathise, (even if you hadnt meant to get empathy from your readers) anyway, i like the way you wrote this =) not much more i can say
46purple x penouch! i can empathise, (even if you hadnt meant to get empathy from your readers) anyway, i like the way you wrote this =) not much more i can say
1/6/2008 c1 half-sketched.staccatos
konnichi wa
I loved this. It felt like... climbing a mountain, and then you fell, and when you screamed it echoed - "" - that's what that last line made me think of: a voice echoing into oblivion from the mountains. It worked perfectly with this poem.
Zaijen
-Shan-
konnichi wa
I loved this. It felt like... climbing a mountain, and then you fell, and when you screamed it echoed - "" - that's what that last line made me think of: a voice echoing into oblivion from the mountains. It worked perfectly with this poem.
Zaijen
-Shan-