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2/7/2009 c1 JClegg
sounds like it could be a cool story if you finish it.
4/4/2008 c3 person is gone
Fascinating ^^ I enjoy this story. Especially like the lines:

“I sort of like it here, anyway. It's like a vacation.”

No it isn't. It's like a pointless excursion.

“Same thing.”

Amusing. Anyway, your descriptions are very good and the story itself is very engaging... my only comment to it is that the Aura bits and all the rest describing her ability drag on a bit in description and it gets tiring. Otherwise 'tis awesome. ^^

Moon's Poetess
2/9/2008 c1 person is gone
So, I like the first part-thinger. Nice ending. We're left wondering why a superweapon would be going for a jog =D

"he grunted to nobody in particular, but nobody answered." I think would sound better as "and nobody answered." but that's just me ^^

Interesting switch in part three. A superweapon been abandoned? Never heard of that before, very original.

Delilah is a cool idea. This story is very unique, I like it.

So, fascinating overall. Nice ending sentence =) Uhm. Dun have much else to say to it. I'd like to read more, I'm wondering now how his intelligence is greater than that of a 5-year-old. Anyway, good work! Very much enjoyed!

Moon's Poetess
2/8/2008 c1 4BrennaRaven
After reading "The Escapist" I had to see what your other work was like and I'm very glad I wasn't disappointed. I was also reminded a little of the game Bioshock but more so of Portal.

I can understand the lack of personality Sam has at the moment as he's been knocked out, unable to communicate or move for ten years. Doesn't really give one the chance to develope much of a personality. I'm interested in seeing what kind of person he's going to become and what your vision of the future will be like in this story. Greatly looking forward to reading more.

Cheers!

-Brenna
1/27/2008 c1 3KnittingKneedle
Hi I'm with the review marathon...link is on my profile.

bah! Thank-you, this is original!

It reminds me a little of a video game, with the missions and messages. The way Sampson was created reminds me a little of Jack from bioshock...which is a fantastic game so that's a compliment!

I wish that you'd spent more time developing Sampson, I didn't really feel like I was getting to know him...I think in the future you should think about his own personal reactions to events because they were fairly generic.

This thing with Delliah, it's really very intruiging and original (yeah I've said that before)!
1/27/2008 c1 dreamshell
I'm surprised with this. In a good way, too. I sort of expected this to be not as well written as it is. So... congrats!

One thing I'd like to suggest (if I may) is to try and avoid BS anti-technology/science rants, save in cases where it's from a character and not part of the narration. I do think that the issue of Samson being unwittedly made into what he is is something worth being examined from a philosophical standpoint, but the act of becoming a transhuman (as, indeed, Samson now is) itself is nothing to defame.

Also, I'd love to see Samson-Delilah romance. =) If they feel the same things, then one can obviously see what roads you could take with that...

Hope this works out!

-dreamshell-
1/27/2008 c1 2iReturn
Great story

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