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7/15/2013 c1 76The Autumn Queen
"Gone" and "won" don't really rhyme, so while the picture there is very nice you might want to reconsider your choice of words in those two lines.

Those were some tough constraints you wrote to, and i think on the whole you did it quite well. I like the images of darkness and silence in this piece; the words you've used have given it a gentle sort of feel which works really well with the sentiment of the poem. Words like "peace" and "anew" really worked well with the piece.

I thought this could use more punctuation though; while each line can stand on its own, I think the pauses/emphasis/links between them still vary but it's not that obvious with the lack of commas, fullstops and/or dashes. Things like [Dwindled power/Forever gone] compared to [Let this align/We'll start anew]. They read quite differently with different pauses between the two lines.

Overall, a nice little poem.
7/27/2008 c1 172DefineBeauty
hmm, this is interesting. i've never heard of a "Minute Poem" before, but i like it =] the format especially. it seems like it would be difficult to write this type of format, but you made it seem easy =]

the flow is really good, it goes from one sentence/stanza to the next with ease and nothing really seems forced about it

the only thing about it is that i don't realyl see the point/message in it, except that it's got a pretty peaceful feel to it. that could just be me though
6/17/2008 c1 495mate.feed.kill.repeat
Cool! You had a very consistent rhythm, as you pointed out in your author note, but I think it's pretty sweet you pulled it off (I wouldn't be able to).

I loved the first stanza. I think it was the coolest part about this. I think the rhythm was most perfect in that stanza.

To me, the last stanza was a bit lacking. Hardly, but just enough to make me wonder what else there is to this. It didn't completely conclude this piece, or as well as I think it could've.

This piece is pretty intense. I really liked it. =]

-stix-
2/2/2008 c1 56WhatAboutDolly
loved it ... cant believe u wrote it in a minute
2/2/2008 c1 23fatbird33
i enjoyed it .
2/2/2008 c1 18Rose Valentine
I just loved this poem. It's so soulful and reality-based.

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