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4/14/2010 c10 savor those enticing dreams
so simple, so sweet, it's adorable.
4/14/2010 c5 savor those enticing dreams
sweet.

a refreshing change, a poem of love without cliche.

i enjoyed myself thoroughly.
10/11/2009 c24 5just to burn
Your writing is so good.
10/2/2009 c36 Isca
"I want to sense the psychedelic, smell the glitter and taste the strobing lights, hear red and touch blue." I like the message here. We all need some kind of 'trip' sometimes, whether it's drug-induced or not. We all need a way of 'letting loose.' I like the way in which you mixed sensory experience with light, colour, etc. :)
8/9/2009 c10 2dragonflydreamer
[hazel moss green] Nice descriptions of something as ordinary as brown hair.

[smell your strawberry shampoo.] I like it. It really shows how sweet and innocent she is through a sense of scent. Very interesting approach to it.

[hazel moss green, shy girl, stop] I don't like that this is all one line. The ideas were so clearly different that the transition felt jarring.

~Sparkles from the Review Marathon (link in profile)
8/9/2009 c9 dragonflydreamer
[such onomatopoeia in the noise] I like how you apply such a poetic concept to an everyday occurance, especially one as harsh and un-poetic as a slamming door.

[cracking wood on the frame] Nice description. It was a nice elaboration on the first part to really let me stop and visualize the image.
8/9/2009 c8 dragonflydreamer
Such an ambiguous idea. I like that, leaving so much up to the readers and really making them think.

I also like the simplicity of it. You said what you needed to say in so few words, and it semes like part of the meaning itself that it's so simple.

The way I interpret this is that there are so many depictions of Jesus-because, after all, it's not like we have any photographs of him-that one person may not reconize another's interpretation. Branching off of that literal, physical meaning, you could look at it as the idea of Jesus is different to everyone, and unrecognizable outside of one's own mind. Then that can branch out to believe in general...

Ah, I love when so few words make me think so much :D
8/9/2009 c7 dragonflydreamer
I love the transition you make in the second section. It goes from such fluid descriptions to such clogged ones, not only in content but in smoothness of the words. Very effective.

[slow in the pop, stop, drop, roll] I love the pulse created by the single syllable/internal rhyme there.
8/9/2009 c5 dragonflydreamer
I love your last line. It sounds so selfish and self-absorbed, which contrasts so well against the beauty of the rest of the piece and really makes your meaning clear.

[the weather outside is/weather –] I really like the description - so obvious it's original. It came off very choppy, though, especially for an opening.
8/9/2009 c4 dragonflydreamer
Your topic here is very interesting. You take such ordinary things and tie weave them into a "fantasy." I love when poetry can give me a new perpective on everyday things like this.

[like tin/can phone calls] That line confused me. It took me a while to figure out that "can" was a noun going with "tin," not a verb going with the second line.
8/9/2009 c3 dragonflydreamer
Such a great tone. You have a very careful control over your word choice and syntax t oreally maximize the effect this has on the reader.

[dill pickle fetishes (so salty sour, oh yes), ] Amazing line. One thing has nothing to do with the other, but you blur them so well that it makes perfect sense.
8/9/2009 c2 dragonflydreamer
Ah, such a great sentiment. I can find myself relating a lot because I'm from the countryside, but the job I'd like to have would require living in NYC or LA. I'm not quite sure I'd want to give up the life I have, or the "reminders of my childhood" as you put it.

[I’ll be able to see the tall glass and steel buildings of New York from my tiny apartment in upstate Wisconsin. ] I like that line. It's nice imagery, plus it serves as a good introduction to your dilemma and a good transition into the rest of the piece.

~Sparkles from the Review Marathon (link in profile)
8/9/2009 c1 dragonflydreamer
Hello there :) I've seen your name quite a few times around this site, but I don't recall ever reading your works. Sorry for that. Looking through some of your reviewers and the sheer number of works you have, I'm quite interested to read this.
7/26/2009 c31 Isca
I like the comparison at the end between oil and deliberative rhetoric - very creative.
7/20/2009 c30 56felicia13
Aw, this one's cute. I'm sort of glad it's not by itself. This is like a little tease of a poem. It belongs here, with its lonesome fellows.

I super love "and i still smile." Wonderful piece, really.

Au revior (for now).

Felicia.
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