for The Streetlights' Orange Glow7/18/2008 c1 
12elisefey
I really like this; it's got a nicely soft tension to it and the ending twist was perfect.
12elisefeyI really like this; it's got a nicely soft tension to it and the ending twist was perfect.
6/19/2008 c1 24ThornlessRose
Wow, that was superbly written with just the kind of twist I like at the end. i'm definatly favoriting it. I'm amazed at how well you can describe things, it's like you were born to write. Congrats. I will definatly check out more of your stories.
24ThornlessRoseWow, that was superbly written with just the kind of twist I like at the end. i'm definatly favoriting it. I'm amazed at how well you can describe things, it's like you were born to write. Congrats. I will definatly check out more of your stories.
3/24/2008 c1 killer chipmunk
I must say that, that may be close to the most confusing thing I've
ever read.Are there two people there or not?Or is just one person with
another person inside it's head?
I must say that, that may be close to the most confusing thing I've
ever read.Are there two people there or not?Or is just one person with
another person inside it's head?
3/7/2008 c1 asklefjaeihog
Reviewers Found!
I really dig some of your lines. They mix in splendidly with the image you create and taking it to a deeper level, and really leave quite an impact. Like, the one line about the sound traveling farther because it has nothing for it to dent.
I would suggest a revision of tense. You frequently start a paragraph in past tense, work in some present tense, and then end with more past tense. Things like that interrupt the flow of a story.
-Rachel
Reviewers Found!
I really dig some of your lines. They mix in splendidly with the image you create and taking it to a deeper level, and really leave quite an impact. Like, the one line about the sound traveling farther because it has nothing for it to dent.
I would suggest a revision of tense. You frequently start a paragraph in past tense, work in some present tense, and then end with more past tense. Things like that interrupt the flow of a story.
-Rachel