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6/20/2009 c4 MedievalWriter Langdon
So I guess my muse decided she'd rather read than write, so here I am. Anyway, I had more than one suggestion for you, so I'm going to go ahead and attach them in an e-mail and send it to you.
6/18/2009 c3 MediealWriter Langdon
Emily! Argh! How could you just... end it... like that? Argh, I say!
6/16/2009 c2 1MedievalWriter Langdon
Dammit, Ems!

You made me cry! Not nice!
6/15/2009 c1 MedievalWriter Langdon
EMILY! WOW! I just got through the first chapter, and I've gotta say... I'm very intrigued! I'm also exhausted and headed to bed, but I don't want to put it down! Unfortunately, my experience with reading things online tend to be rather negative; I saw the rule about proof-reading your stuff, and I can really tell the difference in quality. I found two really minor things, but I thought I'd provide constructive criticism. The first one is more questionable: I was told that "alright" is incorrect. I know spell-check says it's fine, so I guess it's a matter of opinion, but I was taught that it was somehow less dignified than "all right". {insert shrug} The second one, when you're describing the frock coat, you used "waste" instead of "waist". Oops. On the whole... I can't wait to get off work tomorrow and read some more! Way to go!
12/7/2008 c2 the42jabberwocky
wow...that was powerful. amazingly done I must say. I wanted to cry. really i did. you have a good sense of emotion in this here writing, it's a shame I find the time to read only occasionally. The spelling errors you keep warning your readers about are non existent. I really can't say much more than that as that scene about the mother is sifting through my head. Well done.
11/16/2008 c1 the42jabberwocky
sorry it took me so long to actually review something of yours, but life has been at my throat lately, more in a message after this review. I have read the first chapter and it is interesting, i kind of laughed whn you pulled the 'item in a shop that no one knows about' trick. something tells me that coat is special, i guess i'll find out when I get to the other chapters. Not much I can say right now as i've just started reading.
11/7/2008 c10 Hannah
You /should/ be pleased with this. i love your writing style its really descriptive and i am intrigued to see what happens next!
9/1/2008 c1 93Alice Sleeps
This is a great beginning, very enrapturing. I'm curious now about the coat, of course! My only suggestion is to watch your use of articles (a, the) and check up on a few grammatical errors, but honestly the few mistakes there are don't warrant any real overhaul.
7/3/2008 c1 6chuppie
Weell...the grammar could use some work = ) If you like, you can send me the story and I can really get down and dirty with some serious grammatical editing! Spelling always sucks the fun from a review anyway!

Now on to your first chapter. The first paragraph you have is very intriguing, and I like the promise this mysterious building holds. I want to read more and than...all of a sudden, Eleanor is shopping. Your paragraphs flows yes, but I want to know more about this building. All of the detail you devote to describing the clothes could be summarized into one short paragraph.

What I do understand is that Eleanor is restless. She is looking for something that will change the mundane quality of life (hence the shopping- a distraction!). I loved the last paragraph..and I'm sure in the next chapter you do describe how she finds the book.

I'll read your second chapter later today. I'm brain drained from work XP Keep up the good work!

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