for Traitor5/26/2008 c1 
26Sylvara
No matter how hard I try, I can't forgive her. I see no reason for that and aren't merciful enough to give like that I guess.
Well, she was very greedy I believe. Greedy, and yes, coward! I don't see how coming to yell at the Prince make her courageous : anyway she know she would be killed a way or another so she has nothing to lose. Well I could go on like that but it's no really use. Anyway, I don't like the Prince and Josephine from your first version of the story. (I wouldn't mind if you lent me a copy of Cirion-doll trough XD) Hey, btw I can't even imagine how him and his sister manage to drink that filthy muddy whiter or walk barefeet. They deserve respect for that. :)
PS : there is one more practical ting that bothere me between the 1st chapter and le last of the first version : in the first, Kate said something about wearing shoes as if it prevented her from catching lots of deseases on the road. But in the last chap, she remove her shoes (respite the dead animals and excrements and stuff) Is it because she forgot what was the danger it could bring? Didi she, the, became ill after her come back? I'm a little confused. Of course you don't have to explain if it's actually an error that you intend to solve in your new version.
26SylvaraNo matter how hard I try, I can't forgive her. I see no reason for that and aren't merciful enough to give like that I guess.
Well, she was very greedy I believe. Greedy, and yes, coward! I don't see how coming to yell at the Prince make her courageous : anyway she know she would be killed a way or another so she has nothing to lose. Well I could go on like that but it's no really use. Anyway, I don't like the Prince and Josephine from your first version of the story. (I wouldn't mind if you lent me a copy of Cirion-doll trough XD) Hey, btw I can't even imagine how him and his sister manage to drink that filthy muddy whiter or walk barefeet. They deserve respect for that. :)
PS : there is one more practical ting that bothere me between the 1st chapter and le last of the first version : in the first, Kate said something about wearing shoes as if it prevented her from catching lots of deseases on the road. But in the last chap, she remove her shoes (respite the dead animals and excrements and stuff) Is it because she forgot what was the danger it could bring? Didi she, the, became ill after her come back? I'm a little confused. Of course you don't have to explain if it's actually an error that you intend to solve in your new version.