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for on wednesdays

5/29/2008 c1 i-want-2-delete-my-account
I like the second half of this. (Those tattoos onwards). I'm not sure what I think of the first half though.

It's good though.
4/17/2008 c1 13Shasta Valentine
i wish it was longer!

excellent.

although i think i've heard a few of those lines in "The Invisible"

but excellent job, totally under my fav's
4/2/2008 c1 half-sketched.staccatos
konban wa

Wow. This is beautiful. I love that last line: "Little do we know, even the blind can catch gold coins in their hands." People automatically jump to pity. Sure, the blind are missing a piece of life because they can't see, and sight is beautiful - but they aren't creatures to be pitied. They're not creatures at all. They are humans just like us, and their lives aren't these pathetic existences!

This is beautiful. I loved it. The imagery was absolutely fantastic! (Wow, I haven't used the word fantastic in a while.)

Ha det

-Shan-
4/1/2008 c1 871no.peace.los.angeles
Very interesting. You certainly are playing with poetic devices a lot in this, which is nice to see. The first two lines really caught my attention. I think with a little tightening in areas (like line breaks, but I'm a freak about those, anyway), this could be really good. Good work. Keep writing! :)
3/26/2008 c1 52godsandstars
This is interesting. On Wednesdays, she stitches her eyes shut - it gives me the impression that something happens every Wednesday that she doesn't want to see; maybe someone coming to visit she doesn't like, or a weekly task she doesn't want to do? Either way, she's almost optimistic, humming to herself. A distraction. At least, that's how I see it. You've made quite a fascinating character in such a short piece. I'm astounded. She has fooled everyone around her, and for some reason you've drawn attention first to how she has trained her dog, as well as everyone else. I sense lots of turmoil inside of her, and it's all because of Wednesday. It leaves me wondering, honestly, what is wrong, and why it is so bothersome to her.
3/26/2008 c1 260gg. lass
i like this a lot.

the last few lines are amazing.

yours until the wind changes,

gg

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