for That Kind of Luck5/16/2008 c1 
1Cullen P
Wow, I really liked it. Good job! Your dialogue is really intersting to read, which is hard to do. :)
1Cullen PWow, I really liked it. Good job! Your dialogue is really intersting to read, which is hard to do. :)
4/18/2008 c1 10Nat Nair
That event-alternation was a neat device, sort of like flashbacks but subtler - it kept up the suspense and made the narrative more interesting. A couple of sick puns there, haha. The lack of a clear motive for the culprit disappointed me a little though, it felt like a loose end - which is something a good mystery theoretically shouldn't have. But good job, overall. Keep writing!
10Nat NairThat event-alternation was a neat device, sort of like flashbacks but subtler - it kept up the suspense and made the narrative more interesting. A couple of sick puns there, haha. The lack of a clear motive for the culprit disappointed me a little though, it felt like a loose end - which is something a good mystery theoretically shouldn't have. But good job, overall. Keep writing!