for Raspberry Smoke6/30/2008 c1 
9Dot Cubed
Your poetry is too good for me, seriously. It's like practically perfect. I love the imagery and the idea of raspberry smoke as air and the sort of condescending tone the narrator takes. It's just so awesome.
Fave line(s):
"We love being hopelessly addicted/
(and twelve-steps take too much time)"
p.s. hi! :D haven't talked to you in awhile
9Dot CubedYour poetry is too good for me, seriously. It's like practically perfect. I love the imagery and the idea of raspberry smoke as air and the sort of condescending tone the narrator takes. It's just so awesome.
Fave line(s):
"We love being hopelessly addicted/
(and twelve-steps take too much time)"
p.s. hi! :D haven't talked to you in awhile
4/16/2008 c1 88Chidori Nadare
...and we all do it anyway.
I'm not really sure what to think of this but I sure love the representation of 'raspberry smoke' as breathing. This is going to my faves. Great job.
-C.N
88Chidori Nadare...and we all do it anyway.
I'm not really sure what to think of this but I sure love the representation of 'raspberry smoke' as breathing. This is going to my faves. Great job.
-C.N
4/10/2008 c1 24Jennifer
THis is one of my favs of yours. I don't understand it all the way, but i get the gist of it. The best thing on here was/is the imagery. You're imagery rocks.
24JenniferTHis is one of my favs of yours. I don't understand it all the way, but i get the gist of it. The best thing on here was/is the imagery. You're imagery rocks.
4/10/2008 c1 12BlackestOpal
Everybody is doing it.
This is awesome. The italics and the parenthesis really add to it.
This is so cool.
12BlackestOpalEverybody is doing it.
This is awesome. The italics and the parenthesis really add to it.
This is so cool.
4/9/2008 c1 DELETE DELETE DELETE ACCOUNT
I'm not sure how I feel about this. I really love the first couple of lines...but I don't see how "rasberry smoke" symbolizes breathing...and it seems...how do I put this...a bit novice to talk down saying this is breathing, duh...that's what it sounds like. Except for the "in-out-in-out" stuff, I really love the imagery. By using that, you could really rework this into an amazing poem.
I'm not sure how I feel about this. I really love the first couple of lines...but I don't see how "rasberry smoke" symbolizes breathing...and it seems...how do I put this...a bit novice to talk down saying this is breathing, duh...that's what it sounds like. Except for the "in-out-in-out" stuff, I really love the imagery. By using that, you could really rework this into an amazing poem.