for My Brother4/16/2008 c2 
8zerreitug
I really liked this,it's very expresive even though it has simple vocabulary(that's not a bad thing).It shows that you really care about your brother,and that's what poems are usually about,to express feelings.Very well written.
8zerreitugI really liked this,it's very expresive even though it has simple vocabulary(that's not a bad thing).It shows that you really care about your brother,and that's what poems are usually about,to express feelings.Very well written.
4/16/2008 c3 12Esther Jade
Review game!
I liked the poignancy of the poem. The repeating "How come" creates a quite nice echo effect and I think it really works the way you end the poem with just those two little words.
The poem doesn't have a lot of structure. It is quite short but I still think choosing a more deliberate stanza structure would make the progression stronger.
12Esther JadeReview game!
I liked the poignancy of the poem. The repeating "How come" creates a quite nice echo effect and I think it really works the way you end the poem with just those two little words.
The poem doesn't have a lot of structure. It is quite short but I still think choosing a more deliberate stanza structure would make the progression stronger.
4/15/2008 c6 82Billie.Joelle
Review Game:
This was really nice. I am impressed at how much passion and emotion you were able to fit into this one little poem. I can really get the picture of the older brother who doesn't care, and the little broken-hearted sister. Thank you immensely for using punctuation, it makes it flow that much better. I know i'm supposed to say something that needs fixing, but honestly I can't find anything. This poem is amazing, my favorite out of your collection. Nice work. Keep it up! And, take heart. Your brother may realize his mistake and come running back to his little sister. Good job, keep writing!
~BJ
82Billie.JoelleReview Game:
This was really nice. I am impressed at how much passion and emotion you were able to fit into this one little poem. I can really get the picture of the older brother who doesn't care, and the little broken-hearted sister. Thank you immensely for using punctuation, it makes it flow that much better. I know i'm supposed to say something that needs fixing, but honestly I can't find anything. This poem is amazing, my favorite out of your collection. Nice work. Keep it up! And, take heart. Your brother may realize his mistake and come running back to his little sister. Good job, keep writing!
~BJ