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5/4/2008 c1 94AK the Twilight
Hm...this poem is a bit hard to critique. It's a good description of a face, but the speaker seems distracted. The beginning lines and the rest of the poem seem so different from each other. Maybe it's best that way; they do seem to be open to interpretation.

This felt very unique, although it still seems a bit multi-emotional. I can picture it well, so great job on that. It may be a minor fix, but try to make the stanzas connect a bit. Regardless, great job on this.

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