for Redfort: Bride of nogood prince4/20/2009 c1 
30gabijaluvs2rite
This was pretty rushed and extremely confusing in the beginning. You should never throw names and places right in the beginning, it loses people to keep track right away. Everything should develop overtime.
As for potential, the most I can say is... it's okay, I suppose. It seems the ending is such a little thing to worry about, though, and you never give any character thoughts.
30gabijaluvs2riteThis was pretty rushed and extremely confusing in the beginning. You should never throw names and places right in the beginning, it loses people to keep track right away. Everything should develop overtime.
As for potential, the most I can say is... it's okay, I suppose. It seems the ending is such a little thing to worry about, though, and you never give any character thoughts.