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for Perish Twice

7/15/2008 c2 Lana Sky
Wow. Another great chapter. :) Again, the pacing was good (it didn't move too fast) the descriptions were on point, and you described your character really well.

Can't wait for the next chapter!

Ciao!

~nicola~
7/14/2008 c2 5omgitskandice
wow, that was really well executed. I mean the structure was strong and you were detailed without being tedious. Honestly, I remember that the scene with the thunder storm had beautiful imagery. And I love how you can do the fight scene so well. I mean, your character is good without being over-the-top all-powerful.

But i do have a couple of negative comments. in the first chapter you character seemed a little conceited at first glance. that did disappear later, though. also, at two point I noticed (i wish I had made a note where they were) where your writing was very strong then there was suddenly a weak point where the words weren't as... moving, i'll say for lack of better word. this was also in the first chapter. and the last is the little squares that keep popping up at random times.

p.s.: maybe you could help me with the fight scenes. mine are short and kind of vague.
7/1/2008 c1 Lana Sky
Emma seems like a cool character. I wonder what happens? This is interesting.

I wonder why it dosen't have that many reviews? The pacing is good, there are few typos (if any for I haven't seen any) and the descriptions are on point (unlike me who has to add a whole paragraph of useless descriptions) the plot moves very well and seems incredibly original.

Nice! Um, next chapter please?

~nicola~

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