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for like a colour

8/4/2012 c29 firebranding
i wish i had something more substantial to say, but i'm afraid i've never been too good with words. i really like this one, though; i can feel the Amanda vibes.
7/11/2012 c1 6Victoria Best
Hey :D

This is incredible. I absolutely love it - it is stunningly beautiful as well as so innovative and thought-provoking. It really gives you a new perspective on life and makes you question your own role within this world and even made me question morality itself. I love how disjointing it is, almost overwhelming, what with the juxtaposing lengths of stanzas and the words often split up among lines. In all, it is a stunning piece of work.

I may be wrong, but to me, the poem appears to be about trying to find a place somewhere in this world where we belong. It is in our basic human nature to search for acceptance and belonging, and I think this poem illustrates this perfectly. We are fractions really, just as is the title of the poem. We are fractions of light and life, or darkness and death. We are fractions of those material things, which as you put it, are "changeable." Replaceable. Yet they determine our "Faith and pride." They don't mean anything, not in the wide scope of the universe, yet they are paradoxical, for at the same time we could not imagine a life without them. Then there are those fractions that make us who we are. Family, friends, love. We all like to feel that there is a little space in the jigsaw puzzle of this world that we fit into, for we are all fundamentally lonely creatures. Life is really just a question of what will kill us first - loneliness or time. This poem, at least to me, is an exploration of identity, of belonging, of finding out who we really are, and perhaps who we will be. This poem really speaks to me.

Some of my favourite parts include the word "Distilling" on the line of its own to bring attention to it. That section sent chills down my spine. It really began to question morality, why we should be good people, why we should live at all. I got the feeling that the narrator at that point in time is attempting to strip herself of all sins and material items and the pretenses she creates to impress others, to leave only who she really is. Another part I liked was "is that what it's like? being somebody else's impact – not me." Perhaps here the narrator is attempting to view themselves as their own person - that is, not the person someone else wants them to be. I get this feeling because of the line "Being somebody else's." It could be an allusion to the fact that we all try to impress others in our vain attempt to cushion our loneliness. Thus, the character is finally attempting to sever all lies and pretenses and become her true self, the person she wants to be, not the person she tries to be.

Finally, I love the last stanza, particularly the very last lines. "Nothing everything anything." I think here she is trying to see herself in comparison with the scope of the universe. She has decided that she wants to be someone, now she must face the decision of whether to become nothing, (in other words to simply fall through life) to become everything (to keep being hardworking and determined in the hope that she will become successful) or anything (in that her future is open to a world of possibilities, and she will let her fate decide for her.)

This is a brilliant poem and I will read some more of these as soon as I can. You are a very talented writer. Keep writing and following your dreams! :D
7/10/2012 c1 2FixitfelixJRJRJR
I like that you spell colour with a U.

I like that this makes me smile.

I like the last stanza best.

I dislike that FP seriously ate your formatting. Which, of course, isn't your fault.

Well done, good sir, well done.
7/1/2012 c21 9angie79
I really enjoy your poems especially an open heart and a quiet place. the technique is very good!
7/1/2012 c17 14RinaJewelz
Yeah! Perfect poem. Your a great writer
7/1/2012 c18 RinaJewelz
Ach. Know the feeling
7/1/2012 c21 RinaJewelz
Love this poem
7/1/2012 c1 1SiahXSiren
Love the last stanza of this
6/13/2012 c17 105a theoretic revolution
this is really very beautiful, i love the collection you have going on darling, keep up the fabulous writings. :)
6/15/2011 c15 Tytherpol
"how would you recognize confines

when the cage is all you've ever known?"

this this this this tihsi this tihs i this thsis thisthis this

"because i am an adult now." - very unnecessary line that i wish wasnt there

marionette string is the weakest image/analogy in this piece

but yay beautigful piece a great thing to wake up to for sure!
3/1/2011 c14 29Saikai
You have a beautiful way of twisting words into poetry. Thank you for sharing your talent
2/28/2011 c13 6fictionalboyfriend
*bother bother*

Have I mentioned lately that you're a fantastic writer? No? Well, you're a fantastic writer. I love the simplicity of this piece, how frank it is without being childish, and your lyrical style is developing beautifully. :D
1/26/2011 c12 fictionalboyfriend
I have not reviewed anything on your fp account in forEVER. I am lame.

You have a talent for stabbing straight to the heart of a matter, without worrying about being a little harsh. I love that about your poetry; you're very honest without being pretentious or self-congratulatory about it, and you have a very clear view of what's really going on behind what everyone sees.

And damn, I just can't find a single flaw in this. You'll have to ask someone who isn't so in love with your writing.
2/22/2010 c4 26Mirabella
Brilliant metaphor and story held within. :)
2/22/2010 c1 Mirabella
I love photography as well as poetry, so this was a great inclusion for me":

"a photograph of a

crowd, silhouettes bleeding" :)

And i love the ending!
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