for A Reasonable Man5/28/2012 c1 
10KnifeInTheCrayonBox
Wow, this was a pretty cool story. I normally don't like stories that don't have any dialogue, but I think you pulled it off very nicely and I really got to know the character. Very good.
Anyways, to the main point of this comment. A couple days ago, I read your Beta profile, and I was wondering if you could beta read a story of mine. I didn't see a PM message link anywhere on your profile, so I didn't know how to get in touch with you. If you'd be willing to read my story just send me a PM here or e-mail me at guitargrl3294@aim. com. )
10KnifeInTheCrayonBoxWow, this was a pretty cool story. I normally don't like stories that don't have any dialogue, but I think you pulled it off very nicely and I really got to know the character. Very good.
Anyways, to the main point of this comment. A couple days ago, I read your Beta profile, and I was wondering if you could beta read a story of mine. I didn't see a PM message link anywhere on your profile, so I didn't know how to get in touch with you. If you'd be willing to read my story just send me a PM here or e-mail me at guitargrl3294@aim. com. )
7/16/2008 c1 45deefective
In general I really liked this story. I liked the writing style you chose for this one. It has sort of an abstract feel to it and personally I love that best.
Dialog: There was none so I can't say anything about it.
Characters: I like the main character a lot. I think the way you described him in the beginning, middle and end were near perfect.
Also the fact that this story generates a lot of pathos for him is a nice touch. Makes a reader feel closer to him and relate with him in a way because we've all been that afraid at some point in life.
Writing: I like the writing style you chose for this. I don't think any other tense or person could have fit better. The only thing I would say is that at times your sentences trailed on a bit too long. It made that part in the piece sound stretch out and it basically it broke the flow.
Spelling: Everything seem to be in order here. Maybe a bit too many commas but don't worry I do that too.
Enjoyment: I really enjoyed this. Not only did it capture my attention from the beginning but it kept it.
Plot: The plot is not unusual but its not common either so that is a good thing. I'm tired of reading the different versions of the same story all the time.
Other: I also like the way you ended everything but I would read it if there was a continuation The only other thing I can say is that this was a really well written story and I have to give you props for this. Good job.
45deefectiveIn general I really liked this story. I liked the writing style you chose for this one. It has sort of an abstract feel to it and personally I love that best.
Dialog: There was none so I can't say anything about it.
Characters: I like the main character a lot. I think the way you described him in the beginning, middle and end were near perfect.
Also the fact that this story generates a lot of pathos for him is a nice touch. Makes a reader feel closer to him and relate with him in a way because we've all been that afraid at some point in life.
Writing: I like the writing style you chose for this. I don't think any other tense or person could have fit better. The only thing I would say is that at times your sentences trailed on a bit too long. It made that part in the piece sound stretch out and it basically it broke the flow.
Spelling: Everything seem to be in order here. Maybe a bit too many commas but don't worry I do that too.
Enjoyment: I really enjoyed this. Not only did it capture my attention from the beginning but it kept it.
Plot: The plot is not unusual but its not common either so that is a good thing. I'm tired of reading the different versions of the same story all the time.
Other: I also like the way you ended everything but I would read it if there was a continuation The only other thing I can say is that this was a really well written story and I have to give you props for this. Good job.