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11/2/2010 c1 2Lientje46
This is a cute poem! I like it :-)
1/8/2010 c1 17EliMerriman
A simple and quick read, and not so bad for two minutes of work. But beyond being simple, there isn't much to it, and doesn't feel to be from personal experience. Still, I don't feel like I wasted any minutes of my life on it.
10/24/2009 c1 27MoonlightRouge
I like how you start your poem, very nice and creative

keep it up
8/26/2009 c1 19Eternal Skies
maybe if it was a free-verse, it would've came out more naturally? but the poem is really nice and i can feel your frustration! good job!
11/26/2008 c1 5quicktart
Okay, I've pressed the shiny button; now what? :)

I honestly didn't like this one as much as the others of yours I've read so far. But it was good, don't get me wrong!

For another title... hm.

• Hated Angel

• Fallen Angel

• Survival

• I'm Alive

• Red Roses, Red Blood (if she murdered him or feels like it)

• Back Stab

They're probably not as good as some things others and yourself can come up with, though. I have to be given a few days to think about it... But, hey, if I think of a better one between now and some other time, I'll let you know.

~Rébecca
11/12/2008 c1 30DarkPhoenixIncarnate
O_O Wow...excellent~! *FAVS*
10/27/2008 c1 4MarsMonster
How do you do this?

It's insanely good.

Especially the rhyming. Curse you.
10/12/2008 c1 45AStrangerToYou
This is good; I like the last four lines. And the title's pretty good, I don't think you need to change that. Try capitalizing the start of every line. That might help the flow or something. I like it! :)
10/6/2008 c1 12J.A. Swartz
I can't deny myself the pleasure of making girls happy, now can I? ;-) Well, you took the old rhyming adage and turned it on its head. Very interesting. You also made me feel your pain at the betrayal, which is exactly what this kind of poem should do. I love the last four lines of the poem-they describe your joy at leaving this jerk behind so well. Keep on writing, girlie-you're off to a good start!
9/11/2008 c1 23fatbird33
i really like the title actually. nice rhyming
8/22/2008 c1 70PoetryQueen
This was pretty good! I have a few suggestions...

1. oh, what would you do? Just make it what would you do?

2. Take out this line, it will flow better and make more sense, Red roses from violets blue,

3. An idea for the title, Broken Heart, or Freed Wings? Just a suggestion.

One bit of critism, the beginning of every line should be captilized.

Even though I have a lot of stuff written here, this was still a good piece. It told a story fluenty. I liked it. Good job!
8/7/2008 c1 13maddieleigh94
I really like this! I can't believe you wrote it in to minutes, getting it all to rhyme like that!
7/20/2008 c1 29Yasona Black
It felt a little cutesy, with the rhyming and the roses. I think more could come from it. It sounds like it should be a lot more serious than what it is coming across as. "Stabbed me in the back," and "keys to my heart" are both a little cliche, and I think that this could be better with more time and more depth into the emotions felt.
7/19/2008 c1 612simpleplan13
I like how you changed the whose roses are red thing to something totally different, that was a nice twist.

They rhyming worked well, it didn't sound forced or anything.

I have to say though, I didn't like the last line, it was so cliche and so like the song... lol. The other thing is I might work on more images, you have "bright-eyed angel" but some more might be nice.

PS If your bored check out the Review Game and/or it's Review Marathon (link in my profile).
7/19/2008 c1 102Charmingly Temporary
Well, since you reviewed, like, four of my poems I decided I might as well read your stuff. ;) Anyways, this poem was very successful with rhyming, because it was never off beat and it never felt forced. I don't know exactly what I like about the line "Red roses to violets blue" but for some reason it sticks in my head and makes me think about the poem more. Good job! :)
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