for Lucy9/5/2009 c1 
1k+Faithless Juliet
Much like your Sophie piece you show a lot of intricises and edges of a person without giving themselves away completely, which I like, it adds a strong mystery to the piece. I think the Sophie piece was stronger in this regard, however, only because I feel like it shows the portrait of it’s subject stronger.
Although this one is much more broader then the Sophie piece as well.
Jules, via the Review Marathon (links in my profile)
1k+Faithless JulietMuch like your Sophie piece you show a lot of intricises and edges of a person without giving themselves away completely, which I like, it adds a strong mystery to the piece. I think the Sophie piece was stronger in this regard, however, only because I feel like it shows the portrait of it’s subject stronger.
Although this one is much more broader then the Sophie piece as well.
Jules, via the Review Marathon (links in my profile)
5/27/2009 c1 maxineuhmarie
this just made me smile this huge smile - i love it so much! and the tattoo cracked me up.
and i feel like i know a few people who remind me of this - "Lucy reads like she's making excuses"
this just made me smile this huge smile - i love it so much! and the tattoo cracked me up.
and i feel like i know a few people who remind me of this - "Lucy reads like she's making excuses"
12/27/2008 c1 103Jesse the Storyteller
I'm not sure, but I think "over imposing" needs a hyphen in between those words. Sorry to nitpick.
The last line of this is sweet in a funny kind of way. I like it a lot.
"Lucy reads, and Lucy trembles. / ... Lucy reads like she's making excuses" I like these lines a lot. They are nice details and are cleverly worded.
"I hope someone loves Lucy" I think this line is kind of sloppy - it's a little too spelling everything out for a poem.
-Jesse
Attack of the review marathon! (link in profile)
103Jesse the StorytellerI'm not sure, but I think "over imposing" needs a hyphen in between those words. Sorry to nitpick.
The last line of this is sweet in a funny kind of way. I like it a lot.
"Lucy reads, and Lucy trembles. / ... Lucy reads like she's making excuses" I like these lines a lot. They are nice details and are cleverly worded.
"I hope someone loves Lucy" I think this line is kind of sloppy - it's a little too spelling everything out for a poem.
-Jesse
Attack of the review marathon! (link in profile)
9/9/2008 c1 she smolders
I really love what you call your 'people poetry'. After reading this, I feel like I know Lucy and now I want to see her smile too. Take care.
I really love what you call your 'people poetry'. After reading this, I feel like I know Lucy and now I want to see her smile too. Take care.
9/9/2008 c1 perdita
so i've missed our fictionpress friendship camaraderie thing we had
oh
like a couple years ago or something?
and i've missed your writing a LOT
stay beautiful
so i've missed our fictionpress friendship camaraderie thing we had
oh
like a couple years ago or something?
and i've missed your writing a LOT
stay beautiful
8/29/2008 c1 Isca
I liked the constant repetition of the word 'Lucy' and the imagery of her daily life, appearance, values, etc. You have a very unique writing style; your words are simple, but full of emotion. :)
I liked the constant repetition of the word 'Lucy' and the imagery of her daily life, appearance, values, etc. You have a very unique writing style; your words are simple, but full of emotion. :)
8/23/2008 c1 katt kelsibones
this is so incredibly beautiful =]
amazing work!
k.X
this is so incredibly beautiful =]
amazing work!
k.X
8/23/2008 c1 163sharks don't sleep
Ah! This is going in my favorites. :D
I absolutely love "but I can feel her bones waver" and "Lucy reads like she's making excuses."
I love the style of this; just the way Lucy is described in, I don't know, the way you would normally describe someone in the first stanza and then how you branch out and talk about how she reads a certain way in the next really kind of brings this person to life.
And the ending is brilliant for this.
AWESOME job!
Falcon
163sharks don't sleepAh! This is going in my favorites. :D
I absolutely love "but I can feel her bones waver" and "Lucy reads like she's making excuses."
I love the style of this; just the way Lucy is described in, I don't know, the way you would normally describe someone in the first stanza and then how you branch out and talk about how she reads a certain way in the next really kind of brings this person to life.
And the ending is brilliant for this.
AWESOME job!
Falcon