12/16/2011 c17 TheSweetAngel18
hello! new reader haha so i wasnt there for the journey of ur posting the chapters but i read it all

just wanted to say that i like ur story...it was a little diff from others in the sense that elizabeth wasnt as rebellious about the relationship.

however, (thers always a however)...i found that u started alot of 'topics' (for lack of better words) in the beginning of ur story that i think u forgot about, or got carried away with the idea of finishing the story.

u had elizabeths friends introduced in the beginning n they seemed like they were a little important in her life, but possibly got bored with them? idk but even with alex and justin...they were somewhat brushed aside until the end a bit. if u wanted them gone, u could have made a senario that would take away the other characters...such as going on to school...but elizabeth couldnt cuz she had to work to support her sister n was taking a year off with alex and justin who were earning money to go to school.

with Alik i feel that there could have been alot more said about him, about his past. it was great when u mentioned the past with his mentor and how jesse killed him n all that n the timbit about his upbring...but we dont know how he got to that city..how he reacred when he saw elizabeth, or how n what he did to keep himself away from her for 2years. how did he meet doc, or derek, n the other girl demon...he kind of gave off the alpha male feeling, which made me think he was a higher powered demon. but then i got the feeling that he was just older n thats all that was special about him. maybe explain his status in the demon world n why the others followed his lead. ohh but good points about the living in small groups. i liked that part.

but i do love the sister relationship u were building that was good. especially when doc said that he was trying to get rid of their bond. (i think u did a great job with his character he gave me the creeps)

i think u have a great skeleton of a story with some meat to it...so what i would suggest is that u go over your story and see what details u can add to make it more realistic, and to bring ur characters to life. give them all a history, a connection to one another.

but agian i still think this was a good story.

hope i did not offend.

take care

10/8/2011 c1 9Destiny1406
Loved the first chapter :) a few spelling errors but other then that it was good!

7/18/2011 c17 16non.graceful
I hate you! I'm so tired! I stayed up to read this because everytime I tried to fall asleep I had to go back and read a few more chapters! First day back to school tomorrow, it's 2:23 am here and my alarm goes off at 7:15 am, you should be proud of you work..

Just fix up the relationship a bit... It's a bit off in some places.

Did I mention I hate you? Hmm... I'll get over it by the end of the week -.-

3/29/2011 c17 2pendragone96
Um...what about derek, aubrey, and Tim(sorry if I spelled the names wrong)? Are Aubrey and Tim going to stay together? Is Derek going to date another guy(which would be really cute)? Is doc dead? And Jesse? Is Tim okay with it? I really loved this story, and it gave me the biggest tingles in my palms and belly(I'm a hopeless romantic). I hope you at least make a sequel, or fix this up and get it published(not that there's anything wrong with it, I didn't mean to sound mean). It's definitely in my top 5 favorites.

1/26/2011 c17 AnywhereYouGo
This story was lovely :)

1/17/2011 c5 balloonfista
Derek's dead? No!

Ri

12/13/2010 c17 7smurf-love
wow, i didnt expect that ending, i thoght that jesse would have something to do with hurting liz but i didnt think the doc would even if he did ive me the creeps too...