for Where's Adalia?8/7/2009 c1 
17clarity-eatworld
Ah, this was nice to read. I'm a Madina Lake fan myself (I'm even listening to 'Morning Sadness' right now...) and it was quite cool to read a cool article about their album. I liked the way you described the Madina Lake (the town, not the band "/) itself, with a bit on Adalia - you honestly made it sound like Madina Lake (the band, not the town "/) were really reaching out with album.
Of course they were, but I liked the way you described it ("The album seems to be the people’s way of reaching out through the band, inviting all who will listen to join the search for the long-lost Adalia.") It suddenly made me realise why the album was named so, which is weird; I should've noticed it before, really. Haha.
It's sad this didn't make it in your paper, but, hey, I liked reading it XD More people will have read it on here, than in a paper. :D
definitely adding to fav's and recommending to my other friends who like Madina Lake. :D
- jayd
17clarity-eatworldAh, this was nice to read. I'm a Madina Lake fan myself (I'm even listening to 'Morning Sadness' right now...) and it was quite cool to read a cool article about their album. I liked the way you described the Madina Lake (the town, not the band "/) itself, with a bit on Adalia - you honestly made it sound like Madina Lake (the band, not the town "/) were really reaching out with album.
Of course they were, but I liked the way you described it ("The album seems to be the people’s way of reaching out through the band, inviting all who will listen to join the search for the long-lost Adalia.") It suddenly made me realise why the album was named so, which is weird; I should've noticed it before, really. Haha.
It's sad this didn't make it in your paper, but, hey, I liked reading it XD More people will have read it on here, than in a paper. :D
definitely adding to fav's and recommending to my other friends who like Madina Lake. :D
- jayd
4/23/2009 c1 23Damien Vlashtov
Nice, you convinced me to try out the album. From the readers perspective however, I was very confused by the line "Such a place obviously does not exist, especially being set in the 1950s, but where did this fictional town come from?", as it's not readily apparent where you're going from the beginning. It really disrupted the flow by making me jump back and argue-why does it obviously not exist? You make it sound like it doesn't exist because it is A: a town from the 1950's or B: has lies and crime. Clearly, both do exist (if you play into that who "external reality" thing). To clear this up, I would start it with an explanation about the town being fictional, a product of the Leone's creativity, or simply scrap the initial paragraph and begin it a different way. Other than that, good job.
23Damien VlashtovNice, you convinced me to try out the album. From the readers perspective however, I was very confused by the line "Such a place obviously does not exist, especially being set in the 1950s, but where did this fictional town come from?", as it's not readily apparent where you're going from the beginning. It really disrupted the flow by making me jump back and argue-why does it obviously not exist? You make it sound like it doesn't exist because it is A: a town from the 1950's or B: has lies and crime. Clearly, both do exist (if you play into that who "external reality" thing). To clear this up, I would start it with an explanation about the town being fictional, a product of the Leone's creativity, or simply scrap the initial paragraph and begin it a different way. Other than that, good job.
11/20/2008 c1 Rachel
Hi, I think I know the problem. I am on the school newspaper, and I think I actually know the problem, to why it wasn't chosen. School newspapers, tend to like more so fresh matterials, and I don't see how this is. This is also pretty long. Their articles are fairly short. I think the longest one I've seen is maybe five hundred words. I write in the three hundred to three hundred fifty range. It's fairly short. Scan over my Eragon article, and you will see what I mean. It's not bad for an article for fictionpress, though.
Hi, I think I know the problem. I am on the school newspaper, and I think I actually know the problem, to why it wasn't chosen. School newspapers, tend to like more so fresh matterials, and I don't see how this is. This is also pretty long. Their articles are fairly short. I think the longest one I've seen is maybe five hundred words. I write in the three hundred to three hundred fifty range. It's fairly short. Scan over my Eragon article, and you will see what I mean. It's not bad for an article for fictionpress, though.