for Barakah Mercy12/15/2008 c1 
8Written
not a bad story, and you did a good job portraying the culture. however, there were quite a few grammar issues which detracted from my enjoyment of the story.
salam!
8Writtennot a bad story, and you did a good job portraying the culture. however, there were quite a few grammar issues which detracted from my enjoyment of the story.
salam!
11/30/2008 c1 7Bam-There You Go
I liked this a lot. It was very sweet. I especially liked the Urdu used. It's different from the usual languages people might use in their story, plus when I lived in Asia, I heard a bit of Urdu spoken.
7Bam-There You GoI liked this a lot. It was very sweet. I especially liked the Urdu used. It's different from the usual languages people might use in their story, plus when I lived in Asia, I heard a bit of Urdu spoken.
11/25/2008 c1 8Fiona N. Costly
There is some grammatical problems. Where the change in pov starts that should be another paragraph. I do like the use of traditional names and culture, I love when authors do that, I like the plot and I hope you update it soon. I think the introduction of the characters would be better if a) not so many were introduced in the 1st chapter and b) if you described what the looked like.I think your first chapter was great in the description but after that it lacks.
8Fiona N. CostlyThere is some grammatical problems. Where the change in pov starts that should be another paragraph. I do like the use of traditional names and culture, I love when authors do that, I like the plot and I hope you update it soon. I think the introduction of the characters would be better if a) not so many were introduced in the 1st chapter and b) if you described what the looked like.I think your first chapter was great in the description but after that it lacks.