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for Dragon Warriors

12/16/2008 c2 8Jane Bishop
So, I've finally gotten around to reviewing =) Good start, but a couple of little things. Make sure you re-read, and re-re-read through future chapters, so you can catch all the little things (for example, first chapter, first paragraph, you have, "…his short black stayed perfectly still…" I would advise you to add the word "hair" between black and stayed. Also, you might want to revise the sentence itself, as it doesn't make much sense). You also might want to elaborate on some of the things you mentioned. Give a history to the dragons (How did they come to exist? Have the Sages been to Earth before?) and make Matthew's responses more believable. Trust me, if a giant lizard walked up to me and told me I was destined to save the world from aliens, my response would be something along the lines of, "…Huh?"

Otherwise, great job, keep writing, and I anticipate more!


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