for An Imprint of Grief1/8/2009 c1 
37rhymemaker
A poem that makes sense, speaks powerfully, and still sounds like a poem. I really do like your writing.
37rhymemakerA poem that makes sense, speaks powerfully, and still sounds like a poem. I really do like your writing.
1/6/2009 c1 21Patrick-Henry
Wow, that's stunningly visual poem. I like the first line- a black lace veil, in my head. The rhyme is very subtle, and executed well, especially for such a dark poem, as the rhyme does not lighten the words. "Coming undone"- another nice image in my head- ashes, blowing in the wind, and a hug. "My sorrow awakens"-I can just *see* it, like mist rising off the ground. I can sympathize with the next line, and I adore the third. It makes me think of a plagued forest, all gray- incredible.
21Patrick-HenryWow, that's stunningly visual poem. I like the first line- a black lace veil, in my head. The rhyme is very subtle, and executed well, especially for such a dark poem, as the rhyme does not lighten the words. "Coming undone"- another nice image in my head- ashes, blowing in the wind, and a hug. "My sorrow awakens"-I can just *see* it, like mist rising off the ground. I can sympathize with the next line, and I adore the third. It makes me think of a plagued forest, all gray- incredible.
1/5/2009 c1 7Sleeping Moonlight
That was very... dark. I have to say I really enjoyed it. It is a change from your other works, but rather than not turning out well because of the difference, it turned out great. :)
7Sleeping MoonlightThat was very... dark. I have to say I really enjoyed it. It is a change from your other works, but rather than not turning out well because of the difference, it turned out great. :)
1/5/2009 c1 Ademestria
Wow! This is great! I really saw the moment, and that's what poetry is all about, isn't it?
Wow! This is great! I really saw the moment, and that's what poetry is all about, isn't it?
1/2/2009 c1 11StayDown
Oh my goodness, that was awesome. :)
I had to stop and read the last two lines out loud.
Lovely!
xSD
11StayDownOh my goodness, that was awesome. :)
I had to stop and read the last two lines out loud.
Lovely!
xSD
12/30/2008 c1 meduse
this IS dark. and good.
my favorite so far, which is why I'm favoriting it. but I've only read two of your poems.
keep writing :)
~DixieAusten
this IS dark. and good.
my favorite so far, which is why I'm favoriting it. but I've only read two of your poems.
keep writing :)
~DixieAusten
12/28/2008 c1 mooneyed
I like the rhymne scheme and the emotions, especially the way you phrased the first line: "a sense of misery on me shrouds."
very interesting.
Very nice piece.
I like the rhymne scheme and the emotions, especially the way you phrased the first line: "a sense of misery on me shrouds."
very interesting.
Very nice piece.
12/25/2008 c1 115Remera
I liked this poem. The syntax is different in a good way, and I like depressing poetry. ^_^
115RemeraI liked this poem. The syntax is different in a good way, and I like depressing poetry. ^_^
12/24/2008 c1 95lever du soleil
That was good. There is a very powerful feeling in the words. I like the symbolism of the sun in this.
95lever du soleilThat was good. There is a very powerful feeling in the words. I like the symbolism of the sun in this.
12/22/2008 c1 18SomeoneToLove
This is amazing! I like how the rhyming fits in so well, and it doesn't sound fake through the whole poem! I think that's so hard to do well, but you did it!
I also really like the tone of the poem, even though it's sad... I like reading and writing darker stuff.
Ok, I'm done rambling now! :D
Well Done! :)
18SomeoneToLoveThis is amazing! I like how the rhyming fits in so well, and it doesn't sound fake through the whole poem! I think that's so hard to do well, but you did it!
I also really like the tone of the poem, even though it's sad... I like reading and writing darker stuff.
Ok, I'm done rambling now! :D
Well Done! :)
12/14/2008 c1 Cynically In Love
Very depressing poem, but I love how it has that gloomy vibe to it, you know what I mean.
Very depressing poem, but I love how it has that gloomy vibe to it, you know what I mean.
12/13/2008 c1 102The Hippie Nerd
I love the dark atmosphere of this piece, it comes through so effectively. By not explaining the source of the grief, there's an aura of mystery and a universality that helps give it more of an impact. I like the rhyming scheme and the flow, which both work quite well. Some favourite parts:
"I sink to my knees and begin to shake." Love the image of sinking to your knees.
"And the grass seems to be rotting away." Powerful imagery brought to mind.
"It spreads in concentric poisonous rings." Dark and poetic, and the idea of it being in rings is really interesting.
Quite a lot going on in just 12 lines. Well done!
102The Hippie NerdI love the dark atmosphere of this piece, it comes through so effectively. By not explaining the source of the grief, there's an aura of mystery and a universality that helps give it more of an impact. I like the rhyming scheme and the flow, which both work quite well. Some favourite parts:
"I sink to my knees and begin to shake." Love the image of sinking to your knees.
"And the grass seems to be rotting away." Powerful imagery brought to mind.
"It spreads in concentric poisonous rings." Dark and poetic, and the idea of it being in rings is really interesting.
Quite a lot going on in just 12 lines. Well done!
12/13/2008 c1 18Enchanted Starrlite
Indeed there is an atmosphere of gloom veiling this poem but it is very effective. Nice rhyme scheme =-). I liked the way that you ended this "Now the light is dim and the flowers weep." It leaves the poem open to thought. Good work!
18Enchanted StarrliteIndeed there is an atmosphere of gloom veiling this poem but it is very effective. Nice rhyme scheme =-). I liked the way that you ended this "Now the light is dim and the flowers weep." It leaves the poem open to thought. Good work!