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for Addiction

6/16/2010 c4 Themory
I am in no way rushing you and of course you can take as long as you want but I just want you to know that your readers are still waiting with bated breath. =]
1/24/2010 c4 2autumnsprite
Oh my god, i'm seriously addicted to this story! This chapter nearly had me in tears! She must feel so low and alone! I notice you haven't updated this story in a long time, please update, it's so brilliantly written and the story line is so unique :)
1/2/2010 c1 Themory
I have a proposition.

I've read this story since it was first published and I truly do love it but I'm kind of sad that it's kind of slowed down right now.

If you don't mind, could I finish it for you? The story will still be based off of what you have written (the characters/setting will be the same ect.) and I will definitely write your name in the first post as well as the last chapter. I will NOT plagiarize it as my own; if I do make up a new character or something extensive like that then I'll name it as my own but nothing from your original.

The plot I will just improvise from what you have written (I already have some ideas.) Just think of it like a novel with two authors, or maybe like fanfiction for your story.

Of course if you don't want me to do this I won't, this was just an idea I had after seeing the continued lack in updates of this great story.


-Potentially Shoeless
6/8/2009 c4 2i love life
gr8 chapter cant wait 4 the next 1 ...

update soon pls
6/7/2009 c4 109ADSpencer
Great chapter! I read this a few days ago and I had tons to say but no time to review. And now, of course, I've forgotten what it was I was going to say...Oh, bother...

Anyhow, nice work. I love how your description is sparringly used, however, it's put in just the right spot. Nice job with the drama :)
5/30/2009 c4 2righthere431
Poor Wendi, she needs to stop seeing him no matter how much she doesn't want to.
5/30/2009 c4 Ersa Crayold
"I didn’t that was ever going to change." should be "I didn’t think that was ever going to change."

The plot line is very original. When I first read the summary I thought it was gonna be pretty cliched but you managed to throw in a lot of creative factors.

Another thing I really liked is your simple one liners that got straight to the point and made the scene easy to understand.
5/30/2009 c3 Ersa Crayold
“You left me behind. You forgot about me. You never replied to any of the letters that I sent. You can’t even begin to imagine what I went through while you were off gallivanting in Europe. You think I want to tell you what’s been turning my life inside out and upside down?”

Long dialogue, kind of wordy and hard to imagine. I suggest splitting it with actions like: she spoke while wiping a tear droplet away.

I really like your characters. They have a lot of...character. No, really, they are well developed and stay consistent throughout the entire story.
5/30/2009 c2 Ersa Crayold
One line I really liked was: "The distance between us seemed to keep him close by me." It has that paradoxical sense that hooks the reader.

A question: "Maybe it was time for me to try to go cold turkey [again]" does it mean she's tried to deny him of herself in the past? If so I suggest clarifying that.
5/30/2009 c1 Ersa Crayold
Multi-chap EF

One thing I was kind of skeptical about was the name of the girl's "addiction." From the summary I could tell that it was set in modern times, if so, Malachi is fairly un-modern name being the name of a Hebrew prophet. But of course this is just my opinion.

Overall, the first chapter was very interesting. It hooked the reader with it's simple descriptions.
5/30/2009 c4 Stardrag
I'm not really use to the romance scene, but that was definitely well done to me. I think the thing I like the most was that you describe how Wendi felt after like every couple of sentences. I really could see how she reacted to all the words Ethan said, but loved the actions of Malachi.

The second thing I liked is how she stays in character, even when she spoke out against him, she still regressed back into the woman from before.

Oh, and I had to say that when you put in how the phone rang just as it got to that point...I was like no way, setting it up for a deeper plot while cutting out the romance at the same time, NO! lol!


5/29/2009 c4 khalanita
thanks so much for updating! i really love this story.. it's so interesting. hope you get more time to write a few more chapters.

take care ;)
5/24/2009 c3 jiali18
Omg I think this girl is such an idiot. But, I'm liking the story so far. I'm intrigued by the plot and the guy...he's such a bastard that he fascinates me. :D
4/1/2009 c3 righthere431
Oh god! Why would she still let him use her?
3/22/2009 c1 31ByYourSide
What a dark and alluring opening! It definitely pulls the reader in with Wendi's personality, Wendi's spark, and I feel sorry for her too. Such low self esteem... :(

*From the very moment I laid my eyes on him, I was completely and utterly addicted like the way some people get when they've just taken their first hit of ecstasy.*

That was a great opening-it shows her personality and it shows just how deep her addiction goes. I think I know how she feels too, sometimes. Without the ecstasy. @_@ Hee hee.

I like the short paragraphs-it all flows together very well, where eery line moves smoothly from one to the next. That boy sounds marvellously handsome, and I hope he has a heart of gold to give to Wendi, under all that hair.
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