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4/19/2002 c25 98ShadowGal
Thank you SO much for not writing this scene the way you could have. You know, overly sappy and *perfect*. Because nothing is *completely* perfect, ya know? This was a great chapter. Enough of the doubts and such to make it very real, but it was still deliciously sweet. And the bunny dream... :::giggles::: Though, I'm glad that Anthy didn't remember his dream...

Good chapter, though. I admired the way you wrote it. Very nice. (Is nice the right word here? Oh well...)
4/19/2002 c24 ShadowGal
I keep thinking this, and keep forgetting to say it, but for some reason, I just love your chapter titles. The story's title is almost cliche or corny, but it's so simple that it works. Because that's just what this is: a love story. And from what I've heard Manhattan isn't the most ordinary of places, which absolutely fits this type of relationship that Anthony has. Not just with Ben, although that's most of it, but with his family, the city, everything.

Uhhm... Sorry if that didn't make much sense. :::grins sheepishly:::

And, btw, I really do think that you, (unlike me, sigh...) could definitely make a living with your writing, if this story is a good example of what you can do. And I'm not just saying that. I'm so jealous of you... :::sighs, then shrugs and giggles::: Oh well. That's why I'm gonna major in English with an emphasisis in Creative Writing, or straight up Creative Writing... I WILL better myself. Yup yup...

And that was completely off topic and random. I'm sorry. Again.

I absolutely loved this chapter. I think it's actually my favorite one so far, for some really strange reason. I guess it was just a perfect balance of angst and fluff. I loved it.
4/19/2002 c23 ShadowGal
Anthony's new hairstyle came as a bit of a surprise, though I'm not yet sure if I like it or not. His thoughts, and his wishes for simpler times, were very realistic. We all have thoughts like that sometimes, don't we?

Once again, a great chapter.
4/19/2002 c22 ShadowGal
:::giggles happily::: That's the most cheerful I've seen my Anthy-baby in a long time... How lovely! I seriously hope he starts doing what he's supposed to... There. Don't think that was a spoiler, at least...

:::scampers off to read the next chapter:::

:::calls back::: Oh yeah... I love Ben!
4/19/2002 c21 ShadowGal
:::shudders::: I am definitely never giving in to my Mom and going to a psyciatrist. Which I just spelled wrong, but oh well. I'd be afraid they'd play that little tape... :::shudders some more:::

I now like Anthony's parents just a bit less. And this Brian doctor type dude is... Just okay.

Good chapter though.
4/19/2002 c20 ShadowGal
:::Cheers::: Yay! Shaddy's had her Ben-fix for the day. Joy... Even though it wasn't exactly the happiest of chapter. :::shrugs::: Beggars can't be choosers, they always say...

I feel terribly bad for poor Ben-chan. The dear needs better... But I'm hoping that Anthony will *get* better, so things will work out.

And I still can't stand Jake. I kinda feel for him in a way, but I can't stand him any more than I can stand any other sort of bully or jerk. :::makes a face::: Stupid.
4/19/2002 c19 ShadowGal
:::sighs::: They really aren't the best of parents, are they? I've seen a lot worse, but then... They aren't the best. Which makes me incredibley glad to have the parents I do.

""Gay-ee," Gabe chirped," Uhhm... I'm sorry, but I laughed my head off at that comment. Gay(-ee) indeed, little one. You've hit the root of your big brother's problems...

I know that, in his way, Richard tried to be a good parent at the end of this chapter, but if you ask me, it's too little, too late. Guess I'll just have to wait and see though, huh.
4/19/2002 c18 ShadowGal
I don't know if I love or hate Ben's attitude towards the relationship, but I've got the feeling that it might be one of the few things keeping Anthony going.

And I know exactly how Anthony feels. I went through that for about 4 months. I don't remember why it stopped, but... :::shrugs:::

Wonderful, terrible chapter. That's a compliment, you know, even if it didn't come out quite right...
4/19/2002 c17 ShadowGal
Lord... Those poems were... Morbid? Depressing? Sad? Way too close to home and true? And they let you see just how Anthony is feeling, for whatever reason he feels that way. The poems work better than anything else you could have done to let us take a peek at Anthony's soul. Very very wonderful job. Excellent chapter.
4/19/2002 c16 ShadowGal
:::reads author's notes::: Oh. Uhhm... I'm sorry. I've done more spoiling than any other reader, I bet... :::looks guilty::: Please forgive me... I'll be good from now on.

Hmm. Uhhm, did you know that the link to the picture of Ben and Anthony isn't working? So, uhhm, would you mind maybe sending me the picture, if you have it on your harddrive anywhere? My address is , or if that one is full. Sorry for asking, but I kinda really wanna see it if at all possible...

Okay. No spoilers... So, I'll keep it simple. The interaction between Anthony and Ben and Gabe was adorable. Anthony's thought process in the church was very realistic.

And the end of the chapter, with the not-quite conversation between Anthony and his dad, was very realistic too. Simple, mannish. Good.
4/19/2002 c15 ShadowGal
Oh... Man... That was majorly sad. I didn't even bother reading the title of the chapter until after I read the chapter itself, but... Man. Much as I didn't really like him, poor kid didn't deserve to *die*...

But that's the real world, I guess... :::sighs:::

Good chapter anyways. Ben's response to the news of Trevor's was very accurate. Unfortunately.

Gotta read more... And make myself stop crying. :::sniffles::: Man, I'm a wimp...
4/19/2002 c14 ShadowGal
I almost wanted to kick Anthony in the head for babbling about the church so much in the car. I thought it sounded very pretty, but I was pretty sure that a bunch of majorly hetero, practically phobic guys wouldn't. So I was like, "Why doesn't he just SHUT UP?" :::sighs::: Ah, the innocence... Poor boy.

And see what happened? But I was just *so* proud of him when he kissed Jake. That's just what you do in an already hopeless situation... Take away the jerk's power, or at least part of it. Can't make things too much worse, ya know?

And I still can't make myself hate Jake, hard as I try. Poor dear, just so screwed up... *Someone* isn't as confident as they try to appear, now *are* they, Jake darling? :::smirks::: No, I didn't think so...

I *do* hate Chad, however, for the mentioning of rape; that's something you just DON'T do. Which means I hate Will too. Trev isn't quite so bad, at least he felt guilty and stuff. And... At least all the guys 'cept Jake kept resisting...

I may not hate any of them, even Chad and Will. But I seriously don't like them.

But I love Anthony. And Ben. And the end part, where Trev was staring and asked about them... That was perfect. The coldness towards Trev there was just *great*.

And now I must go read more.
4/19/2002 c13 ShadowGal
:::sighs::: I don't want to know what's happened to poor, naive, stupid Anthony, and yet, I do. And I feel sorry for him, for being so... Naive? And overly eager to experience things.

And I feel very, *very* sorry for Ben, just 'cause he knows almost what is happening, but not quite.

And... This was very well written, but I almost hated reading it. Because I want happiness.

Thus I must move to the next chapter...

Good, good job on this chapter, btw.
4/19/2002 c12 ShadowGal
"And then, dear Watson, there was the fact that Anthony was wearing eyeliner." That made me laugh, but it also made me really sad. He's just inviting trouble. Poor thing, just wanting to look pretty... Well, I *never* wear makeup, so he can have my share. But... It's just... I dunno. I bet it'll bring trouble on him...

"He certainly hadn't meant for Ben to look at him and say something like, 'Oh Anthony, you look splendiferous in that make-up'." That was hilarious too. Just great.

And I still feel all anxious, like something really bad is going to happen soon. And I don't like it...

And I feel really really really bad for Anthony and how insecure he is and I just *know* how he feels and I love the poor boy. So what if he's just a figment of your imagination, written down on paper? Or, as the case may be, typed up onto a computer? He's still more real than some people I know, and... Well... I'll cut myself off right here. I feel bad when I babble.

:::sighs and glares at her computer::: See? I knew the fluff was too good to be true... Why'd Ben have to go and accidentally be a JERKY hormone-crazy boy? Stupid...

Well. And that last line isn't exactly *reassuring* ya know? Oh well. I must go on...

Angsty but good chapter. Very well written, as always.

And I still have a long way to go yet...
4/19/2002 c11 ShadowGal
"Ben had never been one to follow the crowd," I'm sorry, but that made me burst out laughing. I'm sure my family must think I'm insane or something. Heh. But... I was thinking, "Oh, if only they knew just how much he doesn't follow the crowd..."

But that could be bad. So, nevermind.

And when it got to the part when Anthony had to sing... Well, I felt sorry for him, because I know what it's like to have all your friends/family wanting you to sing for them, but you really don't like having everyone's attention on you. But... I really wanted to hear his voice. Forget how Ben got, *I* got all goose-bumpy! :::grins::: The way you described it was just absolutely gorgeous. :::shivers happily::: Really really pretty. Almost sensual, somehow, though I'm not sure how a description of a *Christmas* song can be just that...

"Ben shook his head, both of his dark eyebrows jumping upward over his light brown eyes, which were practically radiating an affectionate glow."

:::sighs and looks jealous::: How perfect. I want a Ben of my own! :::pouts::: I'm in love with that boy, I'm telling you. Well, Anthony too, but since Ben seems to be bi, if he was real, I could possibly have a chance with him. :::scoffs::: Yeah. Right. Whatever...

And the presents were sooo sweet. :::sighs::: Poor Anthony, not even getting a "better" relationship... Not that they can help it.

And as great as this story is, all warm and fuzzy... I keep dreading the next chapter, because I know that things can't stay bright forever. Especially not in a homosexual relationship. :::sighs again:::

So... I'm off to read the next chapter.

I'm really loving this story so far, just to make sure you know.
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