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2/10/2009 c1 146Sexy Vampirechick
I love the little thoughts at the end of each stanza,it gives the poem a different feel and touch of the narrator.I also liked how it was said in the beginning,how the narrator was a coward yet he/she fought till the end and still hoping for success.Really well written!
2/7/2009 c1 Isca
"I'm fine." I like that you repeated this because it shows just how 'not okay' the speaker is. It's also very relatable, which I liked, since when someone asks me how I am, I often say 'I'm fine' just to cover up my real emotions.

"I used to be a pity monster, graven with all thoughts of grief." Your diction here is superb; 'pity monster' and 'graven.'

"I stopped. I cried. I lived." This part was so powerful. It's like a personal crisis: you break, you cry, you mend.

Keep up the good work!


(The Review Game - Poems - Easy Fix)
1/10/2009 c1 Carus
I really like the dialogue you've used in this - I think it makes it more personal and so the reader feels more involved.

I had no idea what you meant by this line, however:

'I used to main and dot and grind,'

I found it confusing. But great poem overall :) I liked the structure, as well.


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