for You Can Run But12/12/2009 c1 
13Ruby Kart
Haha, What a dramatic story with a very simple end. A game of hide and seek, or man hunt seeing as though the stakes seemed a bit higher.
I like the descriptions. You're missing a few spaces though. Some of your words run together as in resonatedassomething. Just be careful. Maybe your key got stuck or something.
Anyway, I liked it. Very imaginative and gripping. But the ending was satisfying. Causing your readers to slap our head in "Aw man! It was just a game!" lol. Good Job
13Ruby KartHaha, What a dramatic story with a very simple end. A game of hide and seek, or man hunt seeing as though the stakes seemed a bit higher.
I like the descriptions. You're missing a few spaces though. Some of your words run together as in resonatedassomething. Just be careful. Maybe your key got stuck or something.
Anyway, I liked it. Very imaginative and gripping. But the ending was satisfying. Causing your readers to slap our head in "Aw man! It was just a game!" lol. Good Job