for Crash Landing on 12th Street6/15/2011 c4 awesomepossum
i love this story and I would really really like it if you continued it please :D
i love this story and I would really really like it if you continued it please :D
8/22/2009 c4 
14Kicon
You misspelled "another" and "lifetime" when she was asking if he wanted to eat or not. Other than that, it was awesome! I love it!
~Kicon
14KiconYou misspelled "another" and "lifetime" when she was asking if he wanted to eat or not. Other than that, it was awesome! I love it!
~Kicon
8/21/2009 c4 6Lanie Is
Um, Max needs to die.
And the mean girl with a whorish non-subtibility. ^^
:D
JUST KIDDING.
-kind of...
Update soon?
6Lanie IsUm, Max needs to die.
And the mean girl with a whorish non-subtibility. ^^
:D
JUST KIDDING.
-kind of...
Update soon?
8/21/2009 c4 Mo
OH! Trenton is falling for Kayla! And Max didn't have the guts to make some girl stop flirting with him even though he was on a DATE with ANOTHER GIRL! Geezums.
I like Trenton better than Max. He seems like he would be better for her.
UPDATE SOON!
~Mo~
OH! Trenton is falling for Kayla! And Max didn't have the guts to make some girl stop flirting with him even though he was on a DATE with ANOTHER GIRL! Geezums.
I like Trenton better than Max. He seems like he would be better for her.
UPDATE SOON!
~Mo~
8/21/2009 c3 Mo
This Melissa girl scares me.
Should i have a reason to be scared?
Actaully... I think I should be more afraid of Teddy... ;)
~Mo~
This Melissa girl scares me.
Should i have a reason to be scared?
Actaully... I think I should be more afraid of Teddy... ;)
~Mo~
8/19/2009 c4 Karyn
Your story is very captivating. You have a certain way of writing that makes it so I can't stop reading, even if I'd wanted to. I like your characters, they're really well formed and rounded. Finish this story, it's really good. I do have a few comments though. You need to make it so this story isn't so choppy. I wondered why Kay was sitting in the rain on the stairs behind the diner, you never said why she was there, nor did you give a good reason for her being there. Make sure that when your writing, you're making everything flow like music, if it doesn't flow, sometimes things get left out and then it's a little harder to follow. I really did enjoy your story though. I'm not sure why I liked it so much, but when I got to the end of what you have written, I found myself wishing there was more. The whole love triangle is a very intriguing idea. To me, Trenton seems dark and mysterious and his story still needs to come to light. I'd say that within the next chapter, you may want to have him tell Kay what his story is, or something is going to be missing. Keep writing, it's a good story.
~Karyn
Your story is very captivating. You have a certain way of writing that makes it so I can't stop reading, even if I'd wanted to. I like your characters, they're really well formed and rounded. Finish this story, it's really good. I do have a few comments though. You need to make it so this story isn't so choppy. I wondered why Kay was sitting in the rain on the stairs behind the diner, you never said why she was there, nor did you give a good reason for her being there. Make sure that when your writing, you're making everything flow like music, if it doesn't flow, sometimes things get left out and then it's a little harder to follow. I really did enjoy your story though. I'm not sure why I liked it so much, but when I got to the end of what you have written, I found myself wishing there was more. The whole love triangle is a very intriguing idea. To me, Trenton seems dark and mysterious and his story still needs to come to light. I'd say that within the next chapter, you may want to have him tell Kay what his story is, or something is going to be missing. Keep writing, it's a good story.
~Karyn
6/27/2009 c3 5Number One Dancing Queen
I bet Friday is really going to be fun for them...I think...Update soon.
5Number One Dancing QueenI bet Friday is really going to be fun for them...I think...Update soon.
6/22/2009 c3 1Hail and Sleet
Hey, I like your story. It's interesting and absorbing. Trenton's my favourite character so far... I don't really know why, but he makes me smile all the time.
This is progressing well, and it can improve more in future. I hope you update soon!
1Hail and SleetHey, I like your story. It's interesting and absorbing. Trenton's my favourite character so far... I don't really know why, but he makes me smile all the time.
This is progressing well, and it can improve more in future. I hope you update soon!
6/21/2009 c3 MarloCarlo10
Loved this chapter!
Although I'm confused on the family situation. I'm guessing that the parents are divorced but what about the living situation of the kids?
Loved this chapter!
Although I'm confused on the family situation. I'm guessing that the parents are divorced but what about the living situation of the kids?