for The Boat8/4/2009 c1 
4k.maag
"The blood-filled boat was quite a nuisance."
...What the HELL? I love that!
Aside from that, this is a really good, psychotically driven story. It definitely has potential as a chapter for something else, but my favorite bits are the quirky, funny parts.
4k.maag"The blood-filled boat was quite a nuisance."
...What the HELL? I love that!
Aside from that, this is a really good, psychotically driven story. It definitely has potential as a chapter for something else, but my favorite bits are the quirky, funny parts.
3/24/2009 c1 50Andrea Lotte
Wow, a very interesting read and concept. One teensy complaint is that you wrote "anyways" when it's actually "anyway." I think you've got the bare bones of it. A bit more development might work, because it feels just a little short. But like I said, great concept, and good use of tone. Nice work!
50Andrea LotteWow, a very interesting read and concept. One teensy complaint is that you wrote "anyways" when it's actually "anyway." I think you've got the bare bones of it. A bit more development might work, because it feels just a little short. But like I said, great concept, and good use of tone. Nice work!