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4/23/2009 c1 1k+Faithless Juliet
You say that you've never written so blunt, all ugly and misunderstood - you are right in a way, this feels very different from the previous two that I've read.

Harsher maybe, more apt to a darker side. I would not call it ugly though. The narrator is confused, situations seem to threaton and change shape at the slightest provication. There is a 'him' involved, I think. But Oh, isn't there always!

I enjoyed this, the verse about the ring feeling too big, makes me think that this is about a wedding, commetment, and change. Keep up the good work.

Much love,

4/5/2009 c1 53Katie Nicole

This is so powerful and absolutely riddled with delicious, beautiful metaphors and rich vocabulary. It's like a scatterbrained collection of thoughts that somehow becomes meaningful as soon as it hits paper, as soon as it's out of your brain.

The context is so clouded by metaphoric descriptions, it's hard to tell what's really happening. But it makes the poem mysterious, and even though the reader can't tell exactly what's going on, the tone is loud and clear.

Great job with this.


4/4/2009 c1 12Sir Scott
Everybody hates themselves at times. Pretty good poem overall.

4/1/2009 c1 5the.other.day
Wow, that was really good. I loved the analogies and definitely made me think and stop to figure the composition. I really do love it and I'm not a fan of poetry. :]

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