for A Knife in the Dark9/5/2009 c4 Astarel
I still think that you should group each scene together, its really confusing when we're flitting from one event to another :P But otherwise, good!
I still think that you should group each scene together, its really confusing when we're flitting from one event to another :P But otherwise, good!
8/26/2009 c3 Lace-1812
I like this one. I like it very much. It's not the same as your usual style, and it's done really well. I love the way all the characters have their own stories, and the setting's really ninja-smashing. I'm going to pester you for updates at school tomorrow...
I like this one. I like it very much. It's not the same as your usual style, and it's done really well. I love the way all the characters have their own stories, and the setting's really ninja-smashing. I'm going to pester you for updates at school tomorrow...
7/29/2009 c3 Astarel
Yay! You know what I think already, so just this - YAY!
Yay! You know what I think already, so just this - YAY!
7/28/2009 c3 JayteaShalite is lazy
haha orz don't want to log in
anyway, this is quite amusing, the take on elves. :] I quite enjoyed that description. I must say it was a little confusing at first, starting after a bar, but it did manage to fit together by the end.
ahh the only thing I can suggest is perhaps using only one punctuation mark after a sentence- ? or ! but not both, only because you probably won't see something like that on an essay and generally published books have just one :T
haha orz don't want to log in
anyway, this is quite amusing, the take on elves. :] I quite enjoyed that description. I must say it was a little confusing at first, starting after a bar, but it did manage to fit together by the end.
ahh the only thing I can suggest is perhaps using only one punctuation mark after a sentence- ? or ! but not both, only because you probably won't see something like that on an essay and generally published books have just one :T
7/22/2009 c2 aPondInTime
Interesting chapter... it just got a bit confusing when you suddenly changed to a different scene, maybe you should put a line in between the two or stars or something. Anway, looking forward to the next :D
Interesting chapter... it just got a bit confusing when you suddenly changed to a different scene, maybe you should put a line in between the two or stars or something. Anway, looking forward to the next :D
7/15/2009 c2 
2Jaetea
Illianis; the Realm of the Light, and Ashvaer; the Realm of the Dark – they're rules and customs were practically non-existent there.
*their
“Well you've found him.”
*Well,
Fantastic, as ever. |D Really, I enjoy reading your works.
2JaeteaIllianis; the Realm of the Light, and Ashvaer; the Realm of the Dark – they're rules and customs were practically non-existent there.
*their
“Well you've found him.”
*Well,
Fantastic, as ever. |D Really, I enjoy reading your works.
7/14/2009 c1 Jaetea
Wow, this is probably the first fic I've read so far that was instantly fun to read. Very nice; keep going. :D
typos; add a comma in the last one
...wouldn't do to wake him up, now would it?
Boy, had she ever botched that assignment.
Wow, this is probably the first fic I've read so far that was instantly fun to read. Very nice; keep going. :D
typos; add a comma in the last one
...wouldn't do to wake him up, now would it?
Boy, had she ever botched that assignment.
7/9/2009 c1 3aPondInTime
Good beginning... looks like another promising story. There were a few minor grammar errors, but otherwise, a great story.
3aPondInTimeGood beginning... looks like another promising story. There were a few minor grammar errors, but otherwise, a great story.