for Less Than Human3/26/2010 c25 merecedeslove
Uh-oh good thing no ones around to criticize her. Then at the same time if he really is that bad then it's not such a good thing that she's alone. Well we'll see what you have in store for these people who are just less than human. ^_^
Uh-oh good thing no ones around to criticize her. Then at the same time if he really is that bad then it's not such a good thing that she's alone. Well we'll see what you have in store for these people who are just less than human. ^_^
3/19/2010 c24 merecedeslove
Aww that was kinda like they're first fight. Well not really but they weren't all happy like they usually are. Good to know they are not perfect.
Aww that was kinda like they're first fight. Well not really but they weren't all happy like they usually are. Good to know they are not perfect.
3/13/2010 c22 merecedeslove
I love love love your story. I love all the powers and the little relationships you've got going on. Now it's getting really juicy with the conflict and more people and more powers! I'm so glad I found this story before it finish! Now I'm going to be able to see it grow! I can't wait to read the rest! ^_^
I love love love your story. I love all the powers and the little relationships you've got going on. Now it's getting really juicy with the conflict and more people and more powers! I'm so glad I found this story before it finish! Now I'm going to be able to see it grow! I can't wait to read the rest! ^_^
3/12/2010 c10 merecedeslove
Aww that's super cute. They seem to really like her! That's good cause she seemed to need some friends.
Aww that's super cute. They seem to really like her! That's good cause she seemed to need some friends.
2/25/2010 c5 bonghi
Wow, this is interesting. Never read something like that. Like it very much.
Wow, this is interesting. Never read something like that. Like it very much.
12/5/2009 c16 butts
I really like the story, it's so good! a few spelling/grammar errors here and there, but the plot is original...At least, compared to the other stories I've read about elemantals! I'm just glad it's not based off the show Avatar, or anything like that.
I really enjoy reading it, can't wait for another chapter!
Luffs lea xx
I really like the story, it's so good! a few spelling/grammar errors here and there, but the plot is original...At least, compared to the other stories I've read about elemantals! I'm just glad it's not based off the show Avatar, or anything like that.
I really enjoy reading it, can't wait for another chapter!
Luffs lea xx
7/23/2009 c2 
39Lestette
So far this story seems really interesting. I would try to expand your ideas more and look for different ways of describing objects or people. For example, "They first had flame red hair and pitch black skin, her hands were engulfed in flames and more flames were creeping around her body like a silk dress."
In the first sentence, you use the word 'flame' three times. Try expanding the image more and looking for other words to describe it.
Then when you get to the, "...like the first girl her pale skinned body was lined with her element of charge, water."
This is kind of confusing because of the sentence structure. It kinda seems like you are saying the first girl had pale skin, when you described it as pitch black. Try changing to order of the sentence to make more sense, like maybe, "her pale skinned body was lined, like the first girl, with her element of charge."
Just a few suggestions. So far I am liking this though and will keep reading.
39LestetteSo far this story seems really interesting. I would try to expand your ideas more and look for different ways of describing objects or people. For example, "They first had flame red hair and pitch black skin, her hands were engulfed in flames and more flames were creeping around her body like a silk dress."
In the first sentence, you use the word 'flame' three times. Try expanding the image more and looking for other words to describe it.
Then when you get to the, "...like the first girl her pale skinned body was lined with her element of charge, water."
This is kind of confusing because of the sentence structure. It kinda seems like you are saying the first girl had pale skin, when you described it as pitch black. Try changing to order of the sentence to make more sense, like maybe, "her pale skinned body was lined, like the first girl, with her element of charge."
Just a few suggestions. So far I am liking this though and will keep reading.