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for Thoughtless

2/3/2010 c6 3craziebabe45
Ah! Oh. My. God. Amazing!

First, their moment while the guys were in the room. I was just ready for the them to be together right then and there. Especially with how sweet Kellan was being.

Then Denny goes and acts like the epitome of a D-Bag lol...I can't believe he took the job. If he is as brilliant as he appears to be, there would be other jobs. You don't just make those decisions on the fly. Sure it's a "once and lifetime" but come on think boy...for all your brains youre pretty dumb

And then thank God they finally kissed lol
2/3/2010 c5 craziebabe45
Oh wow Kellan was acting so nice and sweet and lovable all day. I love him. And with his looks how could Kiera not love him? That would be so hard to live with him, find him that attractive, find out he's an amazing guy and not just a self-absorbed asshole, and have your boyfriend FAR far away. Ick...
2/3/2010 c4 craziebabe45
Aww...so sad that he's leaving. I'm really curious about what Denny said to Kellan though. Had to be something about Kiera and I have a feeling it's going to come back to bit him in the butt. Good character development
2/2/2010 c3 craziebabe45
The bathroom scene was hilarious! I was laughing so hard reading that. I know exactly how she felt right then. I always blush reading what bar bathroom stalls say. I can never figure out how girls have that much time in there since they are so disgusting lol

Kellan is sexy, but I like Griffin's crudeness. It makes me happy lol

Good chapter! You're very talented!
2/2/2010 c2 craziebabe45
Well, I can't really relate to Kiera just yet. She seems so shy and withdrawn. Not much like me at all, but I guess being a in a new city would suck. I was a military brat so that happened to me all the time and you pretty much get used to it. But if after living your entire life in one place you just up and left everything you know...it'd probably be pretty terrifying.

You do a good job of making it seem terrifying. lol

Kellan, though, I can totally relate to. I think every girl knows a guy like this. lol I can't wait to get a piece of him.

Oh, and I lived in Australia for four years when I was younger so Denny's character seems realistic enough! I love the accents...I used to have one.

I'll tell ForeverWasteAway you said thanks for the recommendation. It was a good one!
2/1/2010 c1 craziebabe45
Captivating intro. Amazing use of description. So many stories, even mine, use so much dialogue. Sometimes there is just so much to be said at one point in time that people forget about using description instead. You, however, do not do this. You make the people and scenes come alive. I'm glad that ForeverWasteAway suggested this story to me!
2/1/2010 c26 1ThereAfter
So, I'm honestly not all that sure how to start this review. It'll probably be long, as I know I have tons to say, but I always find beginning a review the hardest. Normally I don't review completed stories, maybe because they're finished and nothing I say will change that in any way, or maybe because I'm lazy. Either way, it doesn't matter. After reading this story (this wonderful, breathtaking, beautiful story) I can't help but review. I feel obligated.

I only recently started reading things on this site. I've been a frequent user of Fanfiction for years, but when I ran out of reading material there, I decided to give Fictionpress a shot. And honestly I'm so glad I did. This story saw probably the best I've read on the whole site, and that's not to say that I haven't read some amazing stories on here. It's just that the emotions that seem to run rampant throughout this story are so incredibly real. I've never been involved in a love triangle, and hopefully I never will be (normally I don't even like reading about them), but I can imagine one existing like this one.

I'll admit that at times I wanted to shake Kiera around a little (or maybe a lot) and tell her to get it together, pick Kellan, and get over herself, but I think that's part of what makes this story work so well. Keira's torn and emotional and scared and in over her head and so many other things and it all comes together perfectly. I guess I should also admit that I never really liked Denny. I understand why Kiera did and in real life I'd die for my own Denny, but at times he just struck me as weak and pathetic and boyish, which simply couldn't compare to Kellan.

And gods did I love Kellan. He was both a mystery and open book at the same time, a paradox yes, but I think somehow fitting. Nothing was easy for him, whether it be connecting with Kiera, opening up to others, or making sense of himself and I think that was wonderfully realistic.

I loved all your characters really. They were fleshed out and seemed to come to life right before my very eyes. Jenny and Evan's kindness and just over all lovability (which I don't think is a word). I was rooting for them to get together pretty much since day one. I loved Griffin's craziness and Anna's equally crazy, though slightly less offensive, behavior. And everyone else too, Rita, Kate, Pete... There was something about them all that just seemed so real.

I loved the unpredictability of everything. I thought I knew what was going to happen and then suddenly everything was tipped on its head. Kiera was right when she said being with Kellan was like being on a rollercoaster, but then I've always loved rollercoasters.

There's this song I know and love that I think captures this story astonishingly well. It's "Between You and I" by Every Avenue and I honestly think you should listen to it. Here are some of the lyrics that I think really fit:

“Maybe it's all for the best,

But I just don't see any good in this, no.

Maybe we'll find something better

But the lovers that leave us

Will always hold the place.

Maybe it was wrong of me to think I could keep you,

And maybe it's the last few drinks

Taking over my mouth and all I've been thinking.

I want you to know that I am fine here without you

But I can't bring myself to lie to you.

And since we're being honest, I feel I should tell you

I've been filling up the empty space between you and I.”

On a slightly critical note, you should definitely watch your use of ‘then’ versus ‘than.’ It drove me slightly crazy the whole story because you were using ‘then’ as the comparative when you should have been using ‘than.’ I don’t mean to be nitpicky, but it’s one of my pet peeves and I figured you’d want to know.

And now I think it’s time that I wrap this up. Basically I love this story. I love its characters, its emotion, its storyline. I wish it had more reviews, it certainly deserves more. I’ll be putting you on alert and will definitely read whatever you post next and I think I’ll probably read your other story. Thanks so much for the wonderful read.
2/1/2010 c26 SnoQueen

This was a GREAT story...

Written EXTREMELY well...

Wow...that was so good...I am lost for words...:)

Keep it up!

~ SnoQueen
1/31/2010 c26 3JRyder Chickadee
incredibly well written...moving...heart wrenching...

honestly one of the best pieces I've ever read on FP.

Very good job, Cupid's Psyche.
1/31/2010 c26 2renegade01
that was an incredibly powerful story and a rollercoaster of emotion.

i love the ending. ;)
1/30/2010 c7 D-Mish
Aw :( He totally heard them having sex didn't he? He came back and heard :( Poor Kellan. I really do like our Aussie though. Gosh...
1/30/2010 c26 6summers-end
I got the update to this story a while ago but I saved it for a free day because I knew once I started, I wouldn't be able to stop. Guess what? I was right, haha.

This was beautifully written, amazing. Kellan's pain, his story-there was incredible depth of character right there. I liked the matching quietness in Keira and him (mostly I suppose when Denny had left for Tucson), it made what they did more meaningful because neither of them were...well Griffin and Anna.

I did wonder about what Keira said-when she thoughtlessly chose Denny-about being scared that their passion would burn out. I had gotten the feeling that she was scared of letting go of Denny's comforting and safe presence but I never got anything about it being because she was worried it wouldn't last with Kellan. In fact, what I thought it was, was that she was worried that what she had for Kellan was too consuming-it didn't fit her quietness, her modesty. But that's just my interpretation.

I totally called Jenny and Evan though! Ever since 4th of July, I don't know why but I guess I noticed the subtlety of it-funny huh? The discreteness of that one moment is what drew my attention to it.

I loved the moments when Kellan opened himself up. I felt like I could taste his fear in my mouth, just reading it.

Going to read the original ending now. Oh, and definitely look into publication if you're interested in that. This stuff here...it's good.

1/29/2010 c2 Anonymous
I love your characters especially the arguing cousins.

1/27/2010 c1 Juliet
Hello, there. It's Juliet from A Drop of Romeo, the romance awards site, and your story was nominated. I really liked it, so I decided to add it. Here's your raving review:

This M-rated story is so underappreciated-it definitely needs some love. The male protagonist, Kellan Kyle is a young rock star who is the sexy guy who's fighting for Kiera's affections. Heart-wrenching and well-worded, this story is definitely a beauty.




1/27/2010 c25 yay
I don't know if you've heard of this song or you listen to this type of music, but you should listen to Rest In Pice by Saliva. It really reminds me of Kellan. I LOVE the story by the way. I think that you could get it published. Yor story brought me to tears. If you ever think of editing the story though, you should think of putting things in Kellan's perspective. For example, how Kellan would be feeling when Kiera and Denny were in the shower; or how he's feeling at the last couple of chapters without Kiera It could also be added to other situations that can have more meaning. It would add a lot of emotion and make up to the story. It is a really REALLY touching story and you could make it even more emotional.
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