1/19/2012 c1 1glassofmilk
LoL very funny chapter, I thought it was a original way to begin the story off with her noticing the shoes and the way they were described was pretty clever.
My favorite line: "These new shoes, however, were bright orange Converse All Stars, of all things. And there they were, resting uncomfortably between a pair of high heeled leather boots that practically sreamed 'fuck me' and a pair of red stilettos." A typo on "screamed" but I liked the analogy you put in there using the shoes, almost as a way to foreshadow something was going to happen. I kept wondering who the owner of the shoes were and at the same time, I was still trying to figure out if the narrator was a girl or a guy.
Good start!
LoL very funny chapter, I thought it was a original way to begin the story off with her noticing the shoes and the way they were described was pretty clever.
My favorite line: "These new shoes, however, were bright orange Converse All Stars, of all things. And there they were, resting uncomfortably between a pair of high heeled leather boots that practically sreamed 'fuck me' and a pair of red stilettos." A typo on "screamed" but I liked the analogy you put in there using the shoes, almost as a way to foreshadow something was going to happen. I kept wondering who the owner of the shoes were and at the same time, I was still trying to figure out if the narrator was a girl or a guy.
Good start!
1/18/2012 c17 aliaschantra
I like Matthew. I don't like Lucas. :D I'll be looking forward to your next chap.
I like Matthew. I don't like Lucas. :D I'll be looking forward to your next chap.
1/18/2012 c17 sarcasm is my middle name
sarcasm is my middle name here, i do have an account under the same name but I'm too lazy to log in :P
I think that you shouldn't make it overdramatic (is that even a word?)...
Maybe in the next chapter Bella should get drunk and try to sleep with Matthew (though if he's a gentleman he'll say no) and then their relationship develops, but she's still working on her plan to hurt Jess or something?
I'm not sure, my writing is not the best as I tend to be waaay too cliched :P
Great chapter, keep up the good work and update asap!
xx
sarcasm is my middle name here, i do have an account under the same name but I'm too lazy to log in :P
I think that you shouldn't make it overdramatic (is that even a word?)...
Maybe in the next chapter Bella should get drunk and try to sleep with Matthew (though if he's a gentleman he'll say no) and then their relationship develops, but she's still working on her plan to hurt Jess or something?
I'm not sure, my writing is not the best as I tend to be waaay too cliched :P
Great chapter, keep up the good work and update asap!
xx
1/18/2012 c17 6deadkitty1
I really like her thought process in this chapter. It revealed a bit more of her regrets and insecurities. As for Matt, it took me a while to remember. I was all like Matthew York... who was he? Then I remembered! XD Matthew = Matt. Haha~ I'm slow.
In a rush of conflicting emotions and having to live with an enemy, she might resort to sleeping with Lucas. It would be so easy & satisfying, yet at the same time, I don't think she should do it. Though, I'm hesitant for her too hook up with Matt too. Uh! So much indecisiveness! You're the author! Surprise me! Hehehe~
Also for Matt, I did feel as if he needed to do a little payback to Isabella for looking down on him so I'm glad he's way hotter now!
I really like her thought process in this chapter. It revealed a bit more of her regrets and insecurities. As for Matt, it took me a while to remember. I was all like Matthew York... who was he? Then I remembered! XD Matthew = Matt. Haha~ I'm slow.
In a rush of conflicting emotions and having to live with an enemy, she might resort to sleeping with Lucas. It would be so easy & satisfying, yet at the same time, I don't think she should do it. Though, I'm hesitant for her too hook up with Matt too. Uh! So much indecisiveness! You're the author! Surprise me! Hehehe~
Also for Matt, I did feel as if he needed to do a little payback to Isabella for looking down on him so I'm glad he's way hotter now!
1/18/2012 c17 7AMessofPickles
NO NO NO NO NO NO!
I'm sorry about that but I had to let out my frustration at Isabella's decision. I mean honestly, she doesn't even know what Jessica was REALLY talking about (although it does sound quite ridiculous and mean). But GAH! I don't want Bella to cheat with Lucas, I mean c'mon! That's not what you do! She's going to screw it all up!
But oh my gosh, I'm really warming up to Matthew York. I hope Bella gets with him instead of Lucas. Because (as far as we know) Matt is not dating anybody ;) Anyways, great chapter, and you did a great job portraying Bella's inner feelings.
Real nice job :D
NO NO NO NO NO NO!
I'm sorry about that but I had to let out my frustration at Isabella's decision. I mean honestly, she doesn't even know what Jessica was REALLY talking about (although it does sound quite ridiculous and mean). But GAH! I don't want Bella to cheat with Lucas, I mean c'mon! That's not what you do! She's going to screw it all up!
But oh my gosh, I'm really warming up to Matthew York. I hope Bella gets with him instead of Lucas. Because (as far as we know) Matt is not dating anybody ;) Anyways, great chapter, and you did a great job portraying Bella's inner feelings.
Real nice job :D
1/18/2012 c17 1NeonTime
I'm not wild about Lucas because he seems all to ready to cheat on his girlfriend. And although I'm always in favour of sex (given how… weirdly redacted and double standard it is in stories on this site) and I wouldn't think less of Bella for sleeping with Lucas, I would think much less of Lucas.
Anyway I really like this story, and the evil roommate twist was a nice one.
I'm not wild about Lucas because he seems all to ready to cheat on his girlfriend. And although I'm always in favour of sex (given how… weirdly redacted and double standard it is in stories on this site) and I wouldn't think less of Bella for sleeping with Lucas, I would think much less of Lucas.
Anyway I really like this story, and the evil roommate twist was a nice one.
1/18/2012 c17 1J-NM23
wow.. Is Mathew York really stalking her? And who would think that serious and boring Mathew York would be at a bar? Isn't that just awesome? That means that there's more than meet the eye.
Okay, little, bitchy Jess may need a pretty payback from Bella but... Why with Lucas? I mean, she loves him and I think he does too. Why ruin something real for someone who is worthless? So, no. I don't think Bella should have sex with Lucas as payback. That would be soooo wrong in every single way.
It was an interesting chapter, we can see Bella's reaction after discovering who really Jessica was. And, although she wanted to look for Lucas for the wrong reasons, I'm glad she found Mathew! He may be someone important for the leading actions! I'm soo waiting for it!
Take care and update soon!
wow.. Is Mathew York really stalking her? And who would think that serious and boring Mathew York would be at a bar? Isn't that just awesome? That means that there's more than meet the eye.
Okay, little, bitchy Jess may need a pretty payback from Bella but... Why with Lucas? I mean, she loves him and I think he does too. Why ruin something real for someone who is worthless? So, no. I don't think Bella should have sex with Lucas as payback. That would be soooo wrong in every single way.
It was an interesting chapter, we can see Bella's reaction after discovering who really Jessica was. And, although she wanted to look for Lucas for the wrong reasons, I'm glad she found Mathew! He may be someone important for the leading actions! I'm soo waiting for it!
Take care and update soon!
1/18/2012 c17 1sailorsweetart
Well, I think yes, Bella should sleep with Lucas, and yes, we should kill Jessica. Oh, that wasnt an option? Well, I still say we do it ;)
Well, I think yes, Bella should sleep with Lucas, and yes, we should kill Jessica. Oh, that wasnt an option? Well, I still say we do it ;)
1/18/2012 c17 nicole7579
wow a shout out in a chapter! cool!
I have ridiculously high expectations of people...its a flaw that I have and I admit that freely haha. I'm not surprised how quickly she jumped straight on the revenge train...I have a feeling her (even more now) confused emotions will make one huge mess. Any chance she won't end up with Lucas? That would also be a good direction to go especially since Matthew has entered the picture again.
Great chapter as always!
wow a shout out in a chapter! cool!
I have ridiculously high expectations of people...its a flaw that I have and I admit that freely haha. I'm not surprised how quickly she jumped straight on the revenge train...I have a feeling her (even more now) confused emotions will make one huge mess. Any chance she won't end up with Lucas? That would also be a good direction to go especially since Matthew has entered the picture again.
Great chapter as always!
1/18/2012 c17 Asrialth
Hey there!
It's been some time since I've reviewed! But omigosh I'm still so hooked! You've done it, this story is awesome!
At the beginning, I was wondering how you were gonna make it okay for Bella to do something like that to Jessica, just when Jess was beginning to be nice. I do hate Jessica now, and I kind of don't like that because I liked her, but I do think it is a very nice solution. If you had continued with Bella fooling around with Lucas behind Sweet Jessicas back, you would have made your readers hate Bella, but now you made it play out well. Plus,there is a lot more storyline about it now.
I do miss writing, before I went to college I did it all the time. I went through something similar as Isabella, I used to write as others ate, but when I started college I lacked time and never have since. (Hence my empty account, haha). But, I didn't mean to linger on myself.
What I wanted to say was that I loved Matthew from the first time you introduced him into the story. When he drove her home and Bella started arguing with him, I genuinely felt bad for him, because he meant so well. Great thing that you got them back together, snuggled up in a cozy bar, beginning to get a little drunk, and both dressed sexier than they have seen each other so far. Add a jealous Lucas to that, and you would have an amazing next chapter :P
Anyways, this is the conclusion, just in case you failed to read the entire book written above here; Amazing story, love your characters, love how Bella isn't perfect, love the way you write. It has a professional edge to it, nicely done. Love Matthew. Live Jessica. Can't seem to love Lucas yet though, not because of you, but just because he is so... unfaithful. That's why I don't want them to sleep together yet. Let him long for her a little longer, haha.
Overall, I'd be thrilled to read more!
Xx
Eline aka Asrialth
Hey there!
It's been some time since I've reviewed! But omigosh I'm still so hooked! You've done it, this story is awesome!
At the beginning, I was wondering how you were gonna make it okay for Bella to do something like that to Jessica, just when Jess was beginning to be nice. I do hate Jessica now, and I kind of don't like that because I liked her, but I do think it is a very nice solution. If you had continued with Bella fooling around with Lucas behind Sweet Jessicas back, you would have made your readers hate Bella, but now you made it play out well. Plus,there is a lot more storyline about it now.
I do miss writing, before I went to college I did it all the time. I went through something similar as Isabella, I used to write as others ate, but when I started college I lacked time and never have since. (Hence my empty account, haha). But, I didn't mean to linger on myself.
What I wanted to say was that I loved Matthew from the first time you introduced him into the story. When he drove her home and Bella started arguing with him, I genuinely felt bad for him, because he meant so well. Great thing that you got them back together, snuggled up in a cozy bar, beginning to get a little drunk, and both dressed sexier than they have seen each other so far. Add a jealous Lucas to that, and you would have an amazing next chapter :P
Anyways, this is the conclusion, just in case you failed to read the entire book written above here; Amazing story, love your characters, love how Bella isn't perfect, love the way you write. It has a professional edge to it, nicely done. Love Matthew. Live Jessica. Can't seem to love Lucas yet though, not because of you, but just because he is so... unfaithful. That's why I don't want them to sleep together yet. Let him long for her a little longer, haha.
Overall, I'd be thrilled to read more!
Xx
Eline aka Asrialth
1/18/2012 c17 AllTimeLow57
Hmm I think i like Matthew better than Lucas already cause even though she loves him he is only playing her. Besides even though hes kinda stuffy I like to think hes hot...
Hmm I think i like Matthew better than Lucas already cause even though she loves him he is only playing her. Besides even though hes kinda stuffy I like to think hes hot...
1/18/2012 c17 2renegade01
I think Bella will, one way or another, get with Lucas. But the appearance of Matthew makes this interesting... ;)
I think Bella will, one way or another, get with Lucas. But the appearance of Matthew makes this interesting... ;)
1/17/2012 c16 7AMessofPickles
That's all? Noooo I hope you update very very soon, and I'm so curious as to what is going on with Jessica and Natalie! Oh man, I hope Izzy doesn't get hurt in all of this. BTW, I'm so happy that she finally made the decision to stay away from Lucas until (hopefully) he and Jess break up.
Anyways, cannot wait for your next update! And can't wait for more Lucas! XD He's such a hottie :P
Great job!
That's all? Noooo I hope you update very very soon, and I'm so curious as to what is going on with Jessica and Natalie! Oh man, I hope Izzy doesn't get hurt in all of this. BTW, I'm so happy that she finally made the decision to stay away from Lucas until (hopefully) he and Jess break up.
Anyways, cannot wait for your next update! And can't wait for more Lucas! XD He's such a hottie :P
Great job!
1/16/2012 c16 10StreetsOfGold
Damn. Just when I was beginning to like Jessica and feel bad that her boyfriend was cheating on her... Well, now she can suck it. Lucas and Bella need to get together! I can't believe she made a bet on Bella! So mean! I can't wait for your next update!
Damn. Just when I was beginning to like Jessica and feel bad that her boyfriend was cheating on her... Well, now she can suck it. Lucas and Bella need to get together! I can't believe she made a bet on Bella! So mean! I can't wait for your next update!
1/14/2012 c16 6deadkitty1
Oh dear... Just when Isabella though she morally righted a wrong. I guess some people are easily two-faced and Jessica's one of them. Great twist! The plot is weaving over so intricately. Isabella's reaction to Jessica's betrayal might spell the climax. Maybe! Not sure.
I am interested in this Lisa person and what Isabella has against her. So I hope this wedding brings even more drama?
Oh dear... Just when Isabella though she morally righted a wrong. I guess some people are easily two-faced and Jessica's one of them. Great twist! The plot is weaving over so intricately. Isabella's reaction to Jessica's betrayal might spell the climax. Maybe! Not sure.
I am interested in this Lisa person and what Isabella has against her. So I hope this wedding brings even more drama?