
3/12/2010 c6
6Nero Wolfe
Wow,that was very very good.. I like the descriptions of it all, i feel really sorry for Ellis, to carry so much guilt al lthe time..

Wow,that was very very good.. I like the descriptions of it all, i feel really sorry for Ellis, to carry so much guilt al lthe time..
3/3/2010 c6
3LetMYEgoBe
Okay I love this story thus far. The only issue I really have is if every thing be in italic until the memory scene. Usually it's the opposite. So is there some particular reason you're doing it this way. The entire first chapter I was expecting it to be the open of a dream or memory. It's a little confusing not having it be so.

Okay I love this story thus far. The only issue I really have is if every thing be in italic until the memory scene. Usually it's the opposite. So is there some particular reason you're doing it this way. The entire first chapter I was expecting it to be the open of a dream or memory. It's a little confusing not having it be so.
1/11/2010 c6 Ipaintwithwords
oh heavens...poor Ellis, carrying around guilt over an accident that happened so long ago...12 yr olds are not known for being careful...
He is a detective, now that is interesting to know...:)
Love it as usual
oh heavens...poor Ellis, carrying around guilt over an accident that happened so long ago...12 yr olds are not known for being careful...
He is a detective, now that is interesting to know...:)
Love it as usual
1/8/2010 c5 Ipaintwithwords
omg...poor maddie...a black eye...:(
Ellis, getting angry on her behalf, loved it. And the kiss, your description of it, so absolutely lovely. :)
I wish she hadn't run away from Ellis, although I do understand why she did...
More soon please :)
omg...poor maddie...a black eye...:(
Ellis, getting angry on her behalf, loved it. And the kiss, your description of it, so absolutely lovely. :)
I wish she hadn't run away from Ellis, although I do understand why she did...
More soon please :)
1/7/2010 c4 Ipaintwithwords
Wow, gosh poor Maddie and William. A cruel father, their mother beaten and then murdered. Trust must not come easy for either of them and I am curious as to how Ellis will manage that...
This is a lovely story!
Wow, gosh poor Maddie and William. A cruel father, their mother beaten and then murdered. Trust must not come easy for either of them and I am curious as to how Ellis will manage that...
This is a lovely story!
1/7/2010 c3 Ipaintwithwords
Wow...William seems angry with Maddie about Ellis...curious indeed.
And she wanting to learn about marital coupling? I am liking Maddie..:)
Wow...William seems angry with Maddie about Ellis...curious indeed.
And she wanting to learn about marital coupling? I am liking Maddie..:)
1/7/2010 c2 Ipaintwithwords
Ellis can't get Maddie out of his mind...a good thing I would think unless he has some hidden motives about her. He is mysterious...:)
Maddie's brother, how lucky he found William to find out more about her. But William seems afraid for his sister...has she been hurt before I wonder
Excellent
Ellis can't get Maddie out of his mind...a good thing I would think unless he has some hidden motives about her. He is mysterious...:)
Maddie's brother, how lucky he found William to find out more about her. But William seems afraid for his sister...has she been hurt before I wonder
Excellent
1/6/2010 c1 Ipaintwithwords
Goodness this is so well written. I am really surprised no one has reviewed this Jules. Count me in!
You have me curious about Madeline and Ellis and am looking forward to seeing what their journey is about. The kiss between them. Very nicely done. I liked getting their thoughts on that.
The only thing I would suggest is to write the story in regular font rather than italics...:)
Goodness this is so well written. I am really surprised no one has reviewed this Jules. Count me in!
You have me curious about Madeline and Ellis and am looking forward to seeing what their journey is about. The kiss between them. Very nicely done. I liked getting their thoughts on that.
The only thing I would suggest is to write the story in regular font rather than italics...:)