for Repeat After Me9/7/2015 c7 MalexisSwerve
OH MY LAWD! THIS WAS PERFECTION! So glad I stumbled across this.
Update soon, I'll be refreshing ;)
OH MY LAWD! THIS WAS PERFECTION! So glad I stumbled across this.
Update soon, I'll be refreshing ;)
1/18/2015 c6 
2treesnail
I really really love this story! I love the characters and the dialogue and the movement of it all! and I really hope you continue! because I'll be super sad if you don't!
ps, if you need someone to edit in order to make things easier, let me know! I love writing, and I wouldn't mind helping out!
2treesnailI really really love this story! I love the characters and the dialogue and the movement of it all! and I really hope you continue! because I'll be super sad if you don't!
ps, if you need someone to edit in order to make things easier, let me know! I love writing, and I wouldn't mind helping out!
2/14/2010 c5 auel
I do realize that there are sudden abrupt POV changes. I don't know if this is intentional.
But the story is in First Person (Jack's POV) and then suddenly there's a "Jack Interjects". Which severely messed up the flow.
Just do keep that in mind, other than that, hope to see more frequent updates! Keep it up :)
I do realize that there are sudden abrupt POV changes. I don't know if this is intentional.
But the story is in First Person (Jack's POV) and then suddenly there's a "Jack Interjects". Which severely messed up the flow.
Just do keep that in mind, other than that, hope to see more frequent updates! Keep it up :)
2/13/2010 c5 23plumblossom
The dialog is not confusing at all in this chapter. It's always clear swho's speaking, and I never had to think about what was going on.
If you're wanting to strive for edver more perfection and transparency, I'd use a few more plain "saids," but it's not necessary - I didn't notice how very active the dialog was until I looked back over it following your author's note request.
In other words, you're doing fine.
23plumblossomThe dialog is not confusing at all in this chapter. It's always clear swho's speaking, and I never had to think about what was going on.
If you're wanting to strive for edver more perfection and transparency, I'd use a few more plain "saids," but it's not necessary - I didn't notice how very active the dialog was until I looked back over it following your author's note request.
In other words, you're doing fine.
1/17/2010 c4 12eafggdsg
I love chapter 4! :D This Liam intruiges me. I wonder who he is... I love Jack and Taylor. They make me laugh. "The silent grapeline" Lol! xD Anyway update soon. I can't wait for chapter 5! :D
I love chapter 4! :D This Liam intruiges me. I wonder who he is... I love Jack and Taylor. They make me laugh. "The silent grapeline" Lol! xD Anyway update soon. I can't wait for chapter 5! :D
1/9/2010 c4 awesomeking
Im so glad you reviewed and it seems to me that the plot is developing. But, because of the lack of... um details, it gets a little confusing with the dialogue. Now its awesome that you updated
Im so glad you reviewed and it seems to me that the plot is developing. But, because of the lack of... um details, it gets a little confusing with the dialogue. Now its awesome that you updated
1/9/2010 c4 AnnaG.Luv
I've waited FAR longer than a month for an update on a story. I still have ones in my favorites that haven't been touched since 2007! Haha man that's sad.
I've waited FAR longer than a month for an update on a story. I still have ones in my favorites that haven't been touched since 2007! Haha man that's sad.
1/9/2010 c4 2CrazyWriter77
Yay! Update, thank you ^^. I really like this story, hope you won't drop it.
2CrazyWriter77Yay! Update, thank you ^^. I really like this story, hope you won't drop it.
1/8/2010 c3 12eafggdsg
Great story so far. I love the interactions between the two main characters. Liam seems like he will be an interesting addition to the story. I must say that I love how Jack speaks. xD Anyway, I really hope you continue this. Keep up the good work and update soon. :D
Great story so far. I love the interactions between the two main characters. Liam seems like he will be an interesting addition to the story. I must say that I love how Jack speaks. xD Anyway, I really hope you continue this. Keep up the good work and update soon. :D
11/15/2009 c3 2CrazyWriter77
Seriously a good read, i like it so far. Hopefully you'll update soon ^^, one of my favorites.
2CrazyWriter77Seriously a good read, i like it so far. Hopefully you'll update soon ^^, one of my favorites.
11/9/2009 c3 5Antilus
Aww, I absolutely love these two. They play so well off each other. Keep it up :)
5AntilusAww, I absolutely love these two. They play so well off each other. Keep it up :)
10/31/2009 c3 Jess
Aw talyor is gay
Aw talyor is gay