3/20/2013 c29 Deeper than Fath
Oh my goodness! I am so glad I found your story when it was completed! This is the hugest cliff hanger I have ever read!
Oh my goodness! I am so glad I found your story when it was completed! This is the hugest cliff hanger I have ever read!
3/20/2013 c28 Deeper than Fath
*Sigh* My aunt loved a boy once, and because she was poor and not white, his parents hated her. Why do people set themselves higher over another? Very intense chapter.
*Sigh* My aunt loved a boy once, and because she was poor and not white, his parents hated her. Why do people set themselves higher over another? Very intense chapter.
3/20/2013 c26 Guest
You were right about the rollarcoaster part.
You did a wonderful job. I love how the emotions were expressed through your words, not by the events or by the writer's crutch (dialoge tags). There were a few sentences that were very powerful. This one, I favor the most:
"You have the power to break me with just one look into your sad eyes and put me back together with just the touch of your hand."
It described the most fearful part of love: the effect the other person has on you. Lovely chapter!
You were right about the rollarcoaster part.
You did a wonderful job. I love how the emotions were expressed through your words, not by the events or by the writer's crutch (dialoge tags). There were a few sentences that were very powerful. This one, I favor the most:
"You have the power to break me with just one look into your sad eyes and put me back together with just the touch of your hand."
It described the most fearful part of love: the effect the other person has on you. Lovely chapter!
3/20/2013 c25 Deeper than Fath
You did a marvelous job at re-creating the fairy tale father. I hope one little girl somewhere in the world has him. I loved the connections between Jeanna life and Eloise's past. I share similar feelings at the sight of a child who frolics in the fairy tale land I once lived in. You long for it again more than usual because you have been confirmed it was real, not a dream; and at that very moment, you feel hopeful, yet deceived. Your mind is conflicted, because you lost hope, yet you see your dreams reoccurring before you. Then a pang of fear seizes your thoughts-how long until that child's dream is over...? It's an overwhelming moment you summed up nicely through actions. Well done.
DTF
You did a marvelous job at re-creating the fairy tale father. I hope one little girl somewhere in the world has him. I loved the connections between Jeanna life and Eloise's past. I share similar feelings at the sight of a child who frolics in the fairy tale land I once lived in. You long for it again more than usual because you have been confirmed it was real, not a dream; and at that very moment, you feel hopeful, yet deceived. Your mind is conflicted, because you lost hope, yet you see your dreams reoccurring before you. Then a pang of fear seizes your thoughts-how long until that child's dream is over...? It's an overwhelming moment you summed up nicely through actions. Well done.
DTF
3/19/2013 c23 Guest
Ha-ha, I wasn't expecting the kiss anyways!
I am glad Eloise wasn't 'magically' hired from the first job she applied to. Man, I wasn't hired from the first fifteen jobs I applied to, seriously! I also wasn't expecting the party-maybe I'm an idiot or something? It was fluff, but good fluff. ;)
Ha-ha, I wasn't expecting the kiss anyways!
I am glad Eloise wasn't 'magically' hired from the first job she applied to. Man, I wasn't hired from the first fifteen jobs I applied to, seriously! I also wasn't expecting the party-maybe I'm an idiot or something? It was fluff, but good fluff. ;)
3/19/2013 c21 Deeper than Fath
Wow, I wish Hana hadn't died. She has so much potential: she was selfless. If she won the battle and restarted her life as a strong woman, she could have transformed many lives like her own. It's a bummer. I am glad-I am assuming right now-this isn't based on a true story, but sadly, the facts aren't. I hope this is an eye-opener to the oblivious.
Suicide isn't the way out. Jesus is.
Wow, I wish Hana hadn't died. She has so much potential: she was selfless. If she won the battle and restarted her life as a strong woman, she could have transformed many lives like her own. It's a bummer. I am glad-I am assuming right now-this isn't based on a true story, but sadly, the facts aren't. I hope this is an eye-opener to the oblivious.
Suicide isn't the way out. Jesus is.
3/19/2013 c20 Deeper than Fath
Yeah...I was too lazy to log in. Great chapters! I love how you can see growth and change! You're really good at this, you know.
Hopefully the next chapter isn't as bad as you made it seem.
Yeah...I was too lazy to log in. Great chapters! I love how you can see growth and change! You're really good at this, you know.
Hopefully the next chapter isn't as bad as you made it seem.
3/18/2013 c14 Guest
Nadine seems to surprise me more and more as I read. Great chappy. :)
Nadine seems to surprise me more and more as I read. Great chappy. :)
3/17/2013 c12 6Deeper than Fathomless
I really thought I would stop reading, since I have to get up in four hours, but I didn't! I might finish the entire story and drink cups and cups of coffee to keep myself awake! *currently running on Milano cookies* My heart will feel weird, but it will be at ease.
I love fluff, filler-whatever you want to call it! It's the unimportant pieces of the story that we all want! An entire book with fluff would be a gift to me! And it's everything a story needs. If our lives didn't have fluff, we'd all go insane...well, I would.
I really thought I would stop reading, since I have to get up in four hours, but I didn't! I might finish the entire story and drink cups and cups of coffee to keep myself awake! *currently running on Milano cookies* My heart will feel weird, but it will be at ease.
I love fluff, filler-whatever you want to call it! It's the unimportant pieces of the story that we all want! An entire book with fluff would be a gift to me! And it's everything a story needs. If our lives didn't have fluff, we'd all go insane...well, I would.
3/17/2013 c11 Deeper than Fathomless
I am worried. This story is reaching the happily-ever-after part and there are more than twenty chapters to go... I am not sure I will be able to function at school and work tomorrow if I continue to read, so I am calling it a night. No more cigarettes for me. :P
Your writing is lovely, inspirational. it's your style. I have been writing for four years, and my character's hardly can hold a long conversation. My shop friends and I are more nonsense, sarcastic small-talk talkers. Maybe I am too crazy to hold a conversation? I dunno, I am going to keep learning/reading your work. Thank you for posting!
Deeper than Fathomless
PS: Extra long author's notes rock! It's like having your own personal blog within your story! Peace, man!
PPS: Sorry for my review that are unrelated to your story!
I am worried. This story is reaching the happily-ever-after part and there are more than twenty chapters to go... I am not sure I will be able to function at school and work tomorrow if I continue to read, so I am calling it a night. No more cigarettes for me. :P
Your writing is lovely, inspirational. it's your style. I have been writing for four years, and my character's hardly can hold a long conversation. My shop friends and I are more nonsense, sarcastic small-talk talkers. Maybe I am too crazy to hold a conversation? I dunno, I am going to keep learning/reading your work. Thank you for posting!
Deeper than Fathomless
PS: Extra long author's notes rock! It's like having your own personal blog within your story! Peace, man!
PPS: Sorry for my review that are unrelated to your story!
3/17/2013 c9 Deeper than Fathomless
You have that way of writing that cause me to forget the horrors I read. You change the mood of the story so well. *Sigh* I can't keep myself from reading; it's like nicotine. I guess I'll have to face an unhappy chef tomorrow.
You have that way of writing that cause me to forget the horrors I read. You change the mood of the story so well. *Sigh* I can't keep myself from reading; it's like nicotine. I guess I'll have to face an unhappy chef tomorrow.
3/17/2013 c8 Deeper than Fathomless
I haven't gone through anything comparable to this (my problems are miniscule), but I do understand the sense of loss and the struggle to overcome a mountain. I believe you portray Eloise pefectly.
I haven't gone through anything comparable to this (my problems are miniscule), but I do understand the sense of loss and the struggle to overcome a mountain. I believe you portray Eloise pefectly.
3/17/2013 c7 Deeper than Fathomless
Such a good chapter until...background check. I guess it can't end with 'happily ever after' within seven chapters. It was very cute and chaste.
Such a good chapter until...background check. I guess it can't end with 'happily ever after' within seven chapters. It was very cute and chaste.
3/17/2013 c6 Deeper than Fathomless
So sad. I considered attending church for six months and was asked three times until I finally agreed. Then I got saved. :) It takes time. Thank you for being realistic.
Oh, yeah, I totally understand the 'sad eyes' thing. Even now, my family says that my eyes look like tear drops, sad eyes. Eyes that cry more often than they blink.
So sad. I considered attending church for six months and was asked three times until I finally agreed. Then I got saved. :) It takes time. Thank you for being realistic.
Oh, yeah, I totally understand the 'sad eyes' thing. Even now, my family says that my eyes look like tear drops, sad eyes. Eyes that cry more often than they blink.
3/17/2013 c4 Deeper than Fathomless
*Sigh* It's just so saddening. It makes me feel more grateful. Lovely chapter.
*Sigh* It's just so saddening. It makes me feel more grateful. Lovely chapter.