for mirage10/3/2010 c1 
58Inkspilled
Simple and cleverly written, I liked the way you put the words, it made it flow well. The first lines leave it so open to interpretation, and you end it so suddenly. The idea really sticks in your mind. Nicely written.
58InkspilledSimple and cleverly written, I liked the way you put the words, it made it flow well. The first lines leave it so open to interpretation, and you end it so suddenly. The idea really sticks in your mind. Nicely written.
8/9/2010 c1 495mate.feed.kill.repeat
I like the timidness of this-the unsureness, & all the maybes. But the ending, that was totally out of the blue. I love it. It made this piece much more light-hearted. I mean, it fits the content-the mirage & the dehydration-but the last two lines are so starkly different than the other three stanzas.
There are so many little things contained in this piece. Each stanza has a story of its own to tell, like there's gotta be a background story that inspired this piece, & then so much more about the glimmer of who he was...
I like this piece. It's so simplistic, yet so complex.
-stix-
495mate.feed.kill.repeatI like the timidness of this-the unsureness, & all the maybes. But the ending, that was totally out of the blue. I love it. It made this piece much more light-hearted. I mean, it fits the content-the mirage & the dehydration-but the last two lines are so starkly different than the other three stanzas.
There are so many little things contained in this piece. Each stanza has a story of its own to tell, like there's gotta be a background story that inspired this piece, & then so much more about the glimmer of who he was...
I like this piece. It's so simplistic, yet so complex.
-stix-