for Just Smile and Nod2/3/2015 c14 bookwurm247
You're doing okay. I actually like it better when the main characters have to prove themselves to each other first. Their relationship will last longer and stronger. As to your update schedule, just do it hen you can. You just have to promise me one thing: NEVER abandon this story. Your story has real potential to be a great story. At least in my opinion. _
You're doing okay. I actually like it better when the main characters have to prove themselves to each other first. Their relationship will last longer and stronger. As to your update schedule, just do it hen you can. You just have to promise me one thing: NEVER abandon this story. Your story has real potential to be a great story. At least in my opinion. _
2/3/2015 c14 Guest
I am in love with this story and have been since I started reading it. Ignore the bad reviews most don't hold merit. I understand you are busy and I love your thought process on how you want the story to develop. How many chapters are you planning on this story to be?
I am in love with this story and have been since I started reading it. Ignore the bad reviews most don't hold merit. I understand you are busy and I love your thought process on how you want the story to develop. How many chapters are you planning on this story to be?
2/1/2015 c14 terribleTiger
I honestly adore this story. The protagonist actually reminds me of my own self, heavily so, in fact. I love how you're putting plot first, instead of romance- this is a lovely rare gem that I'm enjoying. Update when you can, please. I would enjoy more insight on Hayden, though I already have some guesses myself. I feel like, maybe, the bit in this chapter was forced, due to people asking where the romance was. Please, don't try to rush it, hon, take your time. A masterpiece always takes time. I'm sure this could go great places. Just, keep at it!
I honestly adore this story. The protagonist actually reminds me of my own self, heavily so, in fact. I love how you're putting plot first, instead of romance- this is a lovely rare gem that I'm enjoying. Update when you can, please. I would enjoy more insight on Hayden, though I already have some guesses myself. I feel like, maybe, the bit in this chapter was forced, due to people asking where the romance was. Please, don't try to rush it, hon, take your time. A masterpiece always takes time. I'm sure this could go great places. Just, keep at it!
2/1/2015 c2 Mirror.of.Souls
I've just started, and so far, it's been brilliant. I love the position you've placed the main character, as the silent cynical witness. So far, I haven't gotten Alys's full name though, which I thought should have been made known in the first chapter. The way she represents thoughts and feelings through art is not the most original but you've described and depicted it incredibly well. I've noted despite the fact she hears things such as the wrong person being accused of graffiti, she doesn't take action, despite feeling so strongly about it. A weakness, innate fear? It's quite an interesting point. Also, for Alys to see the world with such cynicism all the time (or maybe it's just an exaggeration for the sake of getting the point across) really makes me wonder if she has a mental illness or traumatic event that triggered it. Being 'fake' is not always bad, it can be a self defence mechanism or a way to tolerate people that are...well, intolerable- although I think you realise this, from Kari's opinion. Finally, I've noticed your story for a while now, but your summary put me off. It's just that I have a really big thing about having language like fml and wtf etc. there. Or anywhere in writing. I'm not saying translating literally to what the fck, just changing it. But then again, that's simply my personal opinion, and in the end, it's up to you if you want to listen ( : Once more, great job, and keep it up.
I've just started, and so far, it's been brilliant. I love the position you've placed the main character, as the silent cynical witness. So far, I haven't gotten Alys's full name though, which I thought should have been made known in the first chapter. The way she represents thoughts and feelings through art is not the most original but you've described and depicted it incredibly well. I've noted despite the fact she hears things such as the wrong person being accused of graffiti, she doesn't take action, despite feeling so strongly about it. A weakness, innate fear? It's quite an interesting point. Also, for Alys to see the world with such cynicism all the time (or maybe it's just an exaggeration for the sake of getting the point across) really makes me wonder if she has a mental illness or traumatic event that triggered it. Being 'fake' is not always bad, it can be a self defence mechanism or a way to tolerate people that are...well, intolerable- although I think you realise this, from Kari's opinion. Finally, I've noticed your story for a while now, but your summary put me off. It's just that I have a really big thing about having language like fml and wtf etc. there. Or anywhere in writing. I'm not saying translating literally to what the fck, just changing it. But then again, that's simply my personal opinion, and in the end, it's up to you if you want to listen ( : Once more, great job, and keep it up.
1/31/2015 c14 Shadowswept
Just reread your notes and realized that you said Karri is going to be an antagonist. Wow, wasn't expecting that! You've also intrigued me with the hint about danger from their pasts. I'm super excited about your comment that this story will have multiple layers. That is such a rare thing even in published books. Most of us rely on the instant sexual attraction, because we can't think of any other reason for disparate characters to become involved.
I love the text messages between Hayden and Alys in this chapter, and I appreciate how even those weren't written in a dumbed down style. Despite being teenagers, the two of them don't come across like the type to indulge in chat speak with each other. It suited their personalities, and my favorite was the terse command to answer. I don't know how you managed to convey that with a one word text.
I realize that I'm rambling in this review, and I apologize if I'm repeating myself. I've been anticipating them interacting, and it's just fascinating to me. The scene at Home Depot, describing her awareness of him but not in the usual way of the effect of the hot guy on the wallflower. So much better and more exciting! It's a seduction of the mind rather than the body. Love the comment about his words being warm and dangerous.
The scene at the house is so thrillingly calculated and shows how similar Hayden and Alys are in hiding the truth from other people. That they are revealing the hidden parts to each other makes it so interesting to discover their reactions. The fact that Hayden wants to keep that sketchbook means something. And he's interested to see the rest.
Just reread your notes and realized that you said Karri is going to be an antagonist. Wow, wasn't expecting that! You've also intrigued me with the hint about danger from their pasts. I'm super excited about your comment that this story will have multiple layers. That is such a rare thing even in published books. Most of us rely on the instant sexual attraction, because we can't think of any other reason for disparate characters to become involved.
I love the text messages between Hayden and Alys in this chapter, and I appreciate how even those weren't written in a dumbed down style. Despite being teenagers, the two of them don't come across like the type to indulge in chat speak with each other. It suited their personalities, and my favorite was the terse command to answer. I don't know how you managed to convey that with a one word text.
I realize that I'm rambling in this review, and I apologize if I'm repeating myself. I've been anticipating them interacting, and it's just fascinating to me. The scene at Home Depot, describing her awareness of him but not in the usual way of the effect of the hot guy on the wallflower. So much better and more exciting! It's a seduction of the mind rather than the body. Love the comment about his words being warm and dangerous.
The scene at the house is so thrillingly calculated and shows how similar Hayden and Alys are in hiding the truth from other people. That they are revealing the hidden parts to each other makes it so interesting to discover their reactions. The fact that Hayden wants to keep that sketchbook means something. And he's interested to see the rest.
1/30/2015 c14 
3Just a Little Miss
This story's flow works wonders. The point of view is intriguing, and I couldn't stop reading from chapter one. Also, the pacing is perfect. I appreciate how you've given Alys a background, home life, experience, motive, and a voice that differs from your usual oddball romance. I eagerly await future installments; Hayden in her home and with her journals and subconscious has me on the edge of my seat.
Please update when you may, and good luck with life :)
3Just a Little MissThis story's flow works wonders. The point of view is intriguing, and I couldn't stop reading from chapter one. Also, the pacing is perfect. I appreciate how you've given Alys a background, home life, experience, motive, and a voice that differs from your usual oddball romance. I eagerly await future installments; Hayden in her home and with her journals and subconscious has me on the edge of my seat.
Please update when you may, and good luck with life :)
1/30/2015 c14 69Shadowswept
It's hard to express how much I love this story. It's exceptional already, but you've outdone yourself with this chapter. I didn't know what to expect, but this surpassed whatever vague idea I had in my mind. Of course I knew that you're a good writer, but I had no idea that you are this clever. The plan with the paint is genius! I am in awe and can barely wrap my mind around it.
This review is basically first impressions. I know that I'll read this numerous times and review again. You surprised me in so many ways. It stands to reason that Hayden would be curious about Alys, but I didn't expect his discoveries about her to have such an emotional impact. You wrote it so masterfully that the emotion was conveyed to the reader only by describing their reactions, but not their emotions. A perfect example of show, don't tell.
There is so much more to say, but I'm too excited to think straight. Thank you so much for updating! I care about the story, but I care about the author too. You need sleep to function. I'll gladly wait for updates for as long as it takes.
69ShadowsweptIt's hard to express how much I love this story. It's exceptional already, but you've outdone yourself with this chapter. I didn't know what to expect, but this surpassed whatever vague idea I had in my mind. Of course I knew that you're a good writer, but I had no idea that you are this clever. The plan with the paint is genius! I am in awe and can barely wrap my mind around it.
This review is basically first impressions. I know that I'll read this numerous times and review again. You surprised me in so many ways. It stands to reason that Hayden would be curious about Alys, but I didn't expect his discoveries about her to have such an emotional impact. You wrote it so masterfully that the emotion was conveyed to the reader only by describing their reactions, but not their emotions. A perfect example of show, don't tell.
There is so much more to say, but I'm too excited to think straight. Thank you so much for updating! I care about the story, but I care about the author too. You need sleep to function. I'll gladly wait for updates for as long as it takes.
1/30/2015 c14 1Ink Scribble
You have no idea how much I look forward to seeing that you have updated your story. It's so exciting, intense, electric, it grabs all my focus...even when I should be studying for exams unfortunately. I also really respect how you've decided to develope Alys and Hayden's relationship (slowly, with them proving something to each other). It actually makes it all the more intriguing. I mean even now I find my hands shaking with anticipation. Their simple (haha, simple, yeah right) conversations are so loaded, they are like a constant battle.
Ah, I just want to know what happens with everything, and all those secrets...it pains me to have to wait. However I'll be patient and look forward to another fantastic chapter.
1Ink ScribbleYou have no idea how much I look forward to seeing that you have updated your story. It's so exciting, intense, electric, it grabs all my focus...even when I should be studying for exams unfortunately. I also really respect how you've decided to develope Alys and Hayden's relationship (slowly, with them proving something to each other). It actually makes it all the more intriguing. I mean even now I find my hands shaking with anticipation. Their simple (haha, simple, yeah right) conversations are so loaded, they are like a constant battle.
Ah, I just want to know what happens with everything, and all those secrets...it pains me to have to wait. However I'll be patient and look forward to another fantastic chapter.
1/30/2015 c14 3nlori1234
I love your story! Please don't get too little sleep because of us! I don't mind that you take a long time to update, it's the content that matters! :D
3nlori1234I love your story! Please don't get too little sleep because of us! I don't mind that you take a long time to update, it's the content that matters! :D
1/29/2015 c14 Marie Starr
Yay! You updated, I was really starting to think you put it on hold, but you didn't so it's okay. I really love this chapter, the plan is starting to come into play though we still don't know what it is but I love mysteries so it's fine for me. I also love it because they are starting to be able to form a certain image of each other. I look forward to their development and the revenge. Looking forward to the next update!
Yay! You updated, I was really starting to think you put it on hold, but you didn't so it's okay. I really love this chapter, the plan is starting to come into play though we still don't know what it is but I love mysteries so it's fine for me. I also love it because they are starting to be able to form a certain image of each other. I look forward to their development and the revenge. Looking forward to the next update!
1/23/2015 c13 Shadowswept
I logged out, because I wasn't sure if it would let me review this chapter again. You added quite a bit to this chapter, so I'm thrilled with the update. Hayden is coming more sharply into focus but still remains mysterious. I suspect what his plan might be for them getting away with the mural, but I'm not sure if I've guessed it. It's really exciting now that they are working together, especially with this emotional distance still between them. I'm glad that Tim didn't give up on her, but I'm really worried where she will end up and how this plan will turn out for her.
I love a story that makes me equal parts anxious and excited. Yours does that with every chapter and keeps me intrigued throughout. I was very worried that you had abandoned it, but now I know just to be patient for updates.
I logged out, because I wasn't sure if it would let me review this chapter again. You added quite a bit to this chapter, so I'm thrilled with the update. Hayden is coming more sharply into focus but still remains mysterious. I suspect what his plan might be for them getting away with the mural, but I'm not sure if I've guessed it. It's really exciting now that they are working together, especially with this emotional distance still between them. I'm glad that Tim didn't give up on her, but I'm really worried where she will end up and how this plan will turn out for her.
I love a story that makes me equal parts anxious and excited. Yours does that with every chapter and keeps me intrigued throughout. I was very worried that you had abandoned it, but now I know just to be patient for updates.
1/23/2015 c13 Amy Pond
Awesome :D Please update soon I really can't wait to read the next chapter :D
Awesome :D Please update soon I really can't wait to read the next chapter :D
1/23/2015 c12 Amy Pond
I love that song! You're right, it really does go with this book!
It's very well done, by the way! I love this story :D
I love that song! You're right, it really does go with this book!
It's very well done, by the way! I love this story :D
1/23/2015 c11 Amy Pond
I really like this story! Whatever people say about her character, don't listen to it. I know that readers opinions are important but what you think of your characters matters most. If you think your characters act how you thought they should when you created them then that's how they should act and other people should accept that.
I just thought I'd let you know :)
Also, in my opinion, you do a really good job of showing us her disorder. It's really good!
I've had a lot of trouble keeping myself here writing this review rather than clicking the next button, so I'm going to end it here and continue reading!
Have a nice day! :)
I really like this story! Whatever people say about her character, don't listen to it. I know that readers opinions are important but what you think of your characters matters most. If you think your characters act how you thought they should when you created them then that's how they should act and other people should accept that.
I just thought I'd let you know :)
Also, in my opinion, you do a really good job of showing us her disorder. It's really good!
I've had a lot of trouble keeping myself here writing this review rather than clicking the next button, so I'm going to end it here and continue reading!
Have a nice day! :)