for Chroma11/24/2013 c14 
69Shadowswept
First I have to tell you that I finally listened to the song Konstantine, and I'm astounded how closely you've adhered to the lyrics. I recognized everything from your story. That song had a strong influence on you to inspire you to write this story. Second, I adore Margo. I seriously want her to be a real person. I loved that line she had about Nate and Kon not needing to pollute the air with mindless chatter. I also enjoyed your descriptions of Nate's house. Now we come to the dark stuff. My suspicion has been confirmed. The source of Nate's scar has been revealed. He and Kon have some terrible childhoods in common. Poor Nate goes to Carol to patch him up.
I don't know what will happen next, but I hope they call the police. I have a feeling this has been going on a long time.
69ShadowsweptFirst I have to tell you that I finally listened to the song Konstantine, and I'm astounded how closely you've adhered to the lyrics. I recognized everything from your story. That song had a strong influence on you to inspire you to write this story. Second, I adore Margo. I seriously want her to be a real person. I loved that line she had about Nate and Kon not needing to pollute the air with mindless chatter. I also enjoyed your descriptions of Nate's house. Now we come to the dark stuff. My suspicion has been confirmed. The source of Nate's scar has been revealed. He and Kon have some terrible childhoods in common. Poor Nate goes to Carol to patch him up.
I don't know what will happen next, but I hope they call the police. I have a feeling this has been going on a long time.
11/23/2013 c31 7Salt and Vinegar Pringles
there is so much about this story that i love- the way you have created, developed and centralised the characters; the way you handled the balance of character plots; and more so the emotional strength in your words! it's been an absolute gut-wrenching delight to read this story!
7Salt and Vinegar Pringlesthere is so much about this story that i love- the way you have created, developed and centralised the characters; the way you handled the balance of character plots; and more so the emotional strength in your words! it's been an absolute gut-wrenching delight to read this story!
11/22/2013 c31 bego.oh
I've been following this story for a while now! Is one of my favorites and when you started updating, I knew I had to read it again. I've been reading it the last couples of days nonstop, and I have to say I'm so happy something finally happened between Nate and Kon! I felt the last couples of chapters a rush, but overall I think they were great. I wish Nate and Kon had stayed together or developed some kind of romantic relationship ( I'm a romantic at heart) but I think the ending was true to the characters. You're a great writer! Please keep creating new stories, because you have a gift in the way you tell them;)
( if I have a lot of grammatical errors sorry, English is not my first lenguage )
Ps could you recomende me some stories to read here on fiction press ?
I've been following this story for a while now! Is one of my favorites and when you started updating, I knew I had to read it again. I've been reading it the last couples of days nonstop, and I have to say I'm so happy something finally happened between Nate and Kon! I felt the last couples of chapters a rush, but overall I think they were great. I wish Nate and Kon had stayed together or developed some kind of romantic relationship ( I'm a romantic at heart) but I think the ending was true to the characters. You're a great writer! Please keep creating new stories, because you have a gift in the way you tell them;)
( if I have a lot of grammatical errors sorry, English is not my first lenguage )
Ps could you recomende me some stories to read here on fiction press ?
11/21/2013 c13 69Shadowswept
I loved this chapter! Nate is so fascinating to me, and he was in this entire chapter. It's telling that she would immediately mention him when Carol put her on the spot. Kon is not aware of this, however, and that's part of what makes this story great. Everything is building subconsciously for them to some powerful connection. I'm not sure if Nate is aware of it yet. I don't think he is, but I believe he didn't just decide to spend the day with her for Carol's sake. I think he wanted to be with her. I like that she dropped her guard slightly and told him she was a fan of the band. I've been waiting for Nate to find out about Chris, and it's finally about to happen. He also dropped his guard a little, and I feel like they made progress in this chapter. The final paragraph was amazing. I've never seen that in any other romance story. They wonder what it's like to be with that person, but not what it's like to be the other person. It elevates this story to something much deeper.
As a reader, I have to tell you that you created book heaven with that incredible store that I wish really existed. I found a few words where letters were reversed, like sings instead of signs. I'm sure you'll fix that during your rewrite. Other than that, I don't think that anything else needs to be changed. I'm enjoying this story so much!
69ShadowsweptI loved this chapter! Nate is so fascinating to me, and he was in this entire chapter. It's telling that she would immediately mention him when Carol put her on the spot. Kon is not aware of this, however, and that's part of what makes this story great. Everything is building subconsciously for them to some powerful connection. I'm not sure if Nate is aware of it yet. I don't think he is, but I believe he didn't just decide to spend the day with her for Carol's sake. I think he wanted to be with her. I like that she dropped her guard slightly and told him she was a fan of the band. I've been waiting for Nate to find out about Chris, and it's finally about to happen. He also dropped his guard a little, and I feel like they made progress in this chapter. The final paragraph was amazing. I've never seen that in any other romance story. They wonder what it's like to be with that person, but not what it's like to be the other person. It elevates this story to something much deeper.
As a reader, I have to tell you that you created book heaven with that incredible store that I wish really existed. I found a few words where letters were reversed, like sings instead of signs. I'm sure you'll fix that during your rewrite. Other than that, I don't think that anything else needs to be changed. I'm enjoying this story so much!
11/20/2013 c31 AsokaDeg
I haven't been with this story since the beginning, but I have been with it till the end. I remember, when I found Chroma, when I read the first chapter I had this deep feeling that I just knew this story would be one of the most unique romances out there. Most authors these days follow the cliches like dutifully puppies. But Chroma wasn't like that. It kept the audience guessing till the end. Konstantine is, by far, the most interesting character I've come across in a book. She was so unpredictable and I can say, without a doubt, that I've never met (nor will I ever, probably) a person like her. She's like an onion, I guess, you have to peel her back a layer at a time to even begin to understand her.
Chroma was very well written and I do hope to one day see this on a book shelf. ;) I've never finished a book, but I can guess you feel accomplished at finishing a masterpiece such as Chroma. It probably won't be anytime soon, but I do look forward to seeing more from you, Alora The Sleepy.
I haven't been with this story since the beginning, but I have been with it till the end. I remember, when I found Chroma, when I read the first chapter I had this deep feeling that I just knew this story would be one of the most unique romances out there. Most authors these days follow the cliches like dutifully puppies. But Chroma wasn't like that. It kept the audience guessing till the end. Konstantine is, by far, the most interesting character I've come across in a book. She was so unpredictable and I can say, without a doubt, that I've never met (nor will I ever, probably) a person like her. She's like an onion, I guess, you have to peel her back a layer at a time to even begin to understand her.
Chroma was very well written and I do hope to one day see this on a book shelf. ;) I've never finished a book, but I can guess you feel accomplished at finishing a masterpiece such as Chroma. It probably won't be anytime soon, but I do look forward to seeing more from you, Alora The Sleepy.
11/20/2013 c12 Shadowswept
Now I'm starting to see the problem with Chris. Kon is so much stronger than he was. He wasn't focused on the future like she was, and he was beginning to fall prey to his vices. I continue to be amazed with how you always set each flashback into the perfect place in the story. Jessica is beginning to worry me with her drinking. Her pining for Bryce is completely true to life though. She wouldn't just instantly get over him, even though he was a total sleaze. I feel so bad for Kon! It's so sad how Carol's treating her after everything she went through with her mom.
Nate was awesome in this chapter. He is a terrific brother to Jess. So caring and protective! His relationship with Carol is also wonderful. And I always enjoy his interactions with Kon. Also, I think I'm on the right track about his secret. Carol seems to always be concerned with how his father will react.
Now I'm starting to see the problem with Chris. Kon is so much stronger than he was. He wasn't focused on the future like she was, and he was beginning to fall prey to his vices. I continue to be amazed with how you always set each flashback into the perfect place in the story. Jessica is beginning to worry me with her drinking. Her pining for Bryce is completely true to life though. She wouldn't just instantly get over him, even though he was a total sleaze. I feel so bad for Kon! It's so sad how Carol's treating her after everything she went through with her mom.
Nate was awesome in this chapter. He is a terrific brother to Jess. So caring and protective! His relationship with Carol is also wonderful. And I always enjoy his interactions with Kon. Also, I think I'm on the right track about his secret. Carol seems to always be concerned with how his father will react.
11/20/2013 c7 5sukihana00
I think this is the first time I have read something on this website that has legitimately made me tear up like this chapter did.
I love your writing, especially the hallucination scenes, they are so multidimensional.
Please, please keep writing.
5sukihana00I think this is the first time I have read something on this website that has legitimately made me tear up like this chapter did.
I love your writing, especially the hallucination scenes, they are so multidimensional.
Please, please keep writing.
11/20/2013 c31 2KarmaHope
It may just be me, but I think you could do a fantastic sequel with this. Maybe a few years down the road or after college or something. There is so much unanswered and even more unexplored ... I believe there are just so many options.
I'd like to see it, but it's up to you. I'd understand if you don't want to commit to that :)
(But if you did it should still be Kon x Nate cause if it wasn't I'd cry)
2KarmaHopeIt may just be me, but I think you could do a fantastic sequel with this. Maybe a few years down the road or after college or something. There is so much unanswered and even more unexplored ... I believe there are just so many options.
I'd like to see it, but it's up to you. I'd understand if you don't want to commit to that :)
(But if you did it should still be Kon x Nate cause if it wasn't I'd cry)
11/20/2013 c31 Ace
So... I think I've only left one other review on this story (long, long ago) but I felt the need to leave another :)
This was awesome. A perfect ending. Seriously. Thank you for writing this. 'Konstantine' has been one of my favorite songs for years, and you wrote a beautiful story to go along with it.
You are an amazing writer. Good luck with all of your writing!
-A
So... I think I've only left one other review on this story (long, long ago) but I felt the need to leave another :)
This was awesome. A perfect ending. Seriously. Thank you for writing this. 'Konstantine' has been one of my favorite songs for years, and you wrote a beautiful story to go along with it.
You are an amazing writer. Good luck with all of your writing!
-A
11/20/2013 c31 1leavesfallingup
This seems very much like a conclusion... except for the unexpectedness of Nate leaving and Konstantine's complete peace with it. Very open-ended... which takes courage as a writer. We tend to want to wrap up all of the loose ends in a nice package.
So I salute you (mumble, grumble) for your bold move (spoken through gritted teeth as I assemble the voodoo doll...)
A good story. Sad, but abuse and drugs tend to make stories sad. What is even sadder is that the cycle never seems to end. Even now, somewhere in the world some kid is trying his/her first drug, and, in a fit or temper, someone else is hitting someone weaker for the first time. At least your story had some promise for the future.
1leavesfallingupThis seems very much like a conclusion... except for the unexpectedness of Nate leaving and Konstantine's complete peace with it. Very open-ended... which takes courage as a writer. We tend to want to wrap up all of the loose ends in a nice package.
So I salute you (mumble, grumble) for your bold move (spoken through gritted teeth as I assemble the voodoo doll...)
A good story. Sad, but abuse and drugs tend to make stories sad. What is even sadder is that the cycle never seems to end. Even now, somewhere in the world some kid is trying his/her first drug, and, in a fit or temper, someone else is hitting someone weaker for the first time. At least your story had some promise for the future.
11/20/2013 c31 1ginger heart
aww can't believe it's over :( and i also hope that you'll write a sequel of some sort because i realllly realllly want a happy ending for both kon and nate. together.
and i really love this whole story, i can read it over and over again and i still haven't gotten bored and probably won't either. love how it's all planned out and there are all sorts of connections throughout the whole story, also really great and complex character.
i hope to read another story by you soon enough :)
1ginger heartaww can't believe it's over :( and i also hope that you'll write a sequel of some sort because i realllly realllly want a happy ending for both kon and nate. together.
and i really love this whole story, i can read it over and over again and i still haven't gotten bored and probably won't either. love how it's all planned out and there are all sorts of connections throughout the whole story, also really great and complex character.
i hope to read another story by you soon enough :)
11/20/2013 c31 3ACleverPenName
But Kon and Nate get together later on right? Please write a '10 years later' story! PLEASE PLEASE PRETTY PLEASE!
3ACleverPenNameBut Kon and Nate get together later on right? Please write a '10 years later' story! PLEASE PLEASE PRETTY PLEASE!
11/19/2013 c11 69Shadowswept
Nate is so aware of Kon, but she doesn't realize it. He's only pretending to ignore her in class. His fascination with palm trees is an interesting little quirk which probably has some deeper meaning. Kon is just as aware of Nate. That description of the hairs on the back of her neck standing up was great. I love how you describe her awareness of him. It's not at all the usual he's-so-hot descriptions. I think this way is much more powerful. All the little things build up into something intense. I'm learning so much from your writing style about how to build things naturally instead of being too obvious.
Dr. Sanders is a terrific new character, and he seems to be on good terms with Nate. The therapy is a clever way to reveal more about Kon's past. Her mother was some piece of work. The flashback with Chris was so sad. He is getting involved in the wrong things because of the lure of easy money. Such a terrible situation to be in, all because of irresponsible parents not taking care of their children.
69ShadowsweptNate is so aware of Kon, but she doesn't realize it. He's only pretending to ignore her in class. His fascination with palm trees is an interesting little quirk which probably has some deeper meaning. Kon is just as aware of Nate. That description of the hairs on the back of her neck standing up was great. I love how you describe her awareness of him. It's not at all the usual he's-so-hot descriptions. I think this way is much more powerful. All the little things build up into something intense. I'm learning so much from your writing style about how to build things naturally instead of being too obvious.
Dr. Sanders is a terrific new character, and he seems to be on good terms with Nate. The therapy is a clever way to reveal more about Kon's past. Her mother was some piece of work. The flashback with Chris was so sad. He is getting involved in the wrong things because of the lure of easy money. Such a terrible situation to be in, all because of irresponsible parents not taking care of their children.
11/19/2013 c10 Shadowswept
I found one of those favorite sentences that I was telling you about! Yes, I am so weird. The only thing I remember after that was a pair of strong arms and a feeling in my gut that I'd never felt before. This is genius! It's a spontaneous reaction to him before she consciously knows how she feels about him. I love the subtlety of it.
So now we are getting into it with the problems Kon's presence was sure to cause in this family. It was too good to be true. It's a big change, and people usually have some trouble adjusting to change. Carol was bound to get jealous at some point. I like how you presented Kon's dilemma. She doesn't want to stay where she's not wanted, but she wants so desperately to belong somewhere. I really felt her pain. The end made me choke up with how emotional it was. Also, the mystery of what happened to Nate continues to intrigue and tantalize. I'm starting to suspect something, but I'll see if I'm right.
I found one of those favorite sentences that I was telling you about! Yes, I am so weird. The only thing I remember after that was a pair of strong arms and a feeling in my gut that I'd never felt before. This is genius! It's a spontaneous reaction to him before she consciously knows how she feels about him. I love the subtlety of it.
So now we are getting into it with the problems Kon's presence was sure to cause in this family. It was too good to be true. It's a big change, and people usually have some trouble adjusting to change. Carol was bound to get jealous at some point. I like how you presented Kon's dilemma. She doesn't want to stay where she's not wanted, but she wants so desperately to belong somewhere. I really felt her pain. The end made me choke up with how emotional it was. Also, the mystery of what happened to Nate continues to intrigue and tantalize. I'm starting to suspect something, but I'll see if I'm right.
11/19/2013 c30 1Rita the writer
Where do I begin? To say that I loved this story is a complete understatement. The character decelopment was just extraordinary. I can only think of one book that made me feel closer to a chracter than your story did. Right through I loved Konstantine, I loved Nate and I loved Chris. I just read this entire story in a day and I'm sort of a wreck over it. I have the utmost sympathy to those who had to wait vetween chapters because I definately wouldn't have been able to. You reaaly have a talent for writing, keep at it. I liked how you didn't feel the need to add copious amounts of plot twists and how you stayed true to the characters. I know you keep saying how much you love constructive critisism, but I honestly just can't think of any. I didn't expect this to be as good as it was and I am really glad that I discovered it. Maybe once I've recovered from the book hangover you just gave me I'll be able to come back and write a review with some criticism. For now, congratulations on a job very well done.
1Rita the writerWhere do I begin? To say that I loved this story is a complete understatement. The character decelopment was just extraordinary. I can only think of one book that made me feel closer to a chracter than your story did. Right through I loved Konstantine, I loved Nate and I loved Chris. I just read this entire story in a day and I'm sort of a wreck over it. I have the utmost sympathy to those who had to wait vetween chapters because I definately wouldn't have been able to. You reaaly have a talent for writing, keep at it. I liked how you didn't feel the need to add copious amounts of plot twists and how you stayed true to the characters. I know you keep saying how much you love constructive critisism, but I honestly just can't think of any. I didn't expect this to be as good as it was and I am really glad that I discovered it. Maybe once I've recovered from the book hangover you just gave me I'll be able to come back and write a review with some criticism. For now, congratulations on a job very well done.