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11/4/2014 c13 Lyra Waterflame
So, I know it's been a while, but do you think you might consider writing more? It's good stuff. I'd really like to read more.
7/20/2014 c13 Sam
I wish you would update this story. It is really good and it has become one of my favorites!
4/9/2014 c13 2Why-do-I-need-a-username
NEXT! :D Can't wait for the next one
3/22/2012 c13 6deadkitty1
I have mixed feelings about the story. The beginning could have used a more daunting effect. It felt like you were casually describing the event and not fully embracing the tense atmosphere, the sweat running cold from her interrogation, and the intense gaze of her father's will. Some flair to the descriptions would have improved the story tremendously. Such as when she's using her force field, describe how she's feeling: her skins probably feels like it's being attacked my fire ants and her brain's tinging with repeated pain. It also wouldn't hurt to go deeper into describing the woods where she's escaping. She is a wolf. How it smells, the brilliant colors, and sounds of the animals would put us in the story with her.

Your dialogue is witty and funny although some sentences do seem a bit off like this sentence on Chapter 4:

"Next time, I wouldn't do it to the guy your crushing over's best friend. They'll make sure that your crush hates you."

I had to read it over more than once. I got it. I just didn't get it the first time. Maybe if you put: guy-your-crushing-over's bestfriend, it would have made more sense.

There's another confusing part. In Chapter 3 during the whole 'Vampy' episode: Is Thorn arguing with a Kevin or a David? First it was a Kevin but then it seemed that Kevin changed to David? Confusing... Another thing, I was a bit annoyed that Thorn didn't apologize for calling Kevin/David a Vamp. Yeah he said sorry, but he said sorry for attacking him. Not the provocation that started the whole fight. Thorn just seems like an irresponsible pup who needs a reality check.

The timespan of two months didn't seem that enough for Micheal and Kya to be BESTfriends. Friends, yeah. It would have made more sense if a year had gone by, that way she's forgotten her past a little and her upbringing to act more careless and inappropriate to her class. Then Micheal and the rest of the pack's feelings for her seem more understanding since they've become close and protective of her. It seemed a little unrealistic to form that deep of a bond in as little as two months.

Lucas is a definite hottie. I get that she only sees Micheal as a brother, but I can't help but secretly want them together. She's grown too comfortable to Lucas way too fast. Her resistance to him almost seems nonexistent. Sure she struggles, but not that much. He's a fun arrogant guy. Very possessive but does Kya like that type of guy?

When you took the story away from the woods/running away/adventure part to the romantic/castle part, I was a tiny bit disappointed. I really like the whole running away, maybe planning some rebellion, wolf pack fights, desperate pleas of mercy, loud heated arguments... those sort of thing. I thought that's where the story was headed. Not that I don't like a good romance. I do! It just seemed like fights were gonna happen and it didn't. So I was sad. :(

Uh, Jessica. I'm not only annoyed with her cliche bimbo-ish characterization, but I do hope she plays some secret role? Yes, she's dumb but her emotions are intense. For her love & jealousy, she was ready to snap Kya's neck in half. As for if she might have won... that's another story. I just think you can use her more besides as an annoying character.

I like when the further I read into the story, the plot got better and so did the writing. There were still some scattered grammar and verb tense confusion but I can't remember exactly where they're at to point them out to you. It's still good nonetheless! Kya's a funny character. Oblivious but stubborn. I wonder if she'll even recognize it when she falls in love. XD It's a good story. You can definitely carry it somewhere. Though I do have to tell you... it did remind me a little bit like Twilight. If it's intentional, then ignore me; if it's not, then maybe it's a coincidence? The whole werewolves have 'gifts' especially Kya's as a forcefield is reminiscent to Bella's. It's still an interesting concept! I'm just saying it reminds me of that.

This is a really long review. Sorry. I tend to let my brain wander. I'll end it here! Good luck with the writing!
7/21/2011 c13 chelea
WHAT THE FUCK... you stoped frigging up-dating why the hell would you i have to say that what youve done so far is awsome but please you have to up date...
5/25/2011 c13 FamishedNight
Awesome! too bad she got caught lol. Update soon!
4/1/2011 c13 Vivianna Valerius
oh my love what u have so far plz keep writeing and posting this story. with your story u take me to another world

thanks so much for shareing

vv
2/13/2011 c13 aurora101
UPDATE! I love this story!
1/9/2011 c13 1MusicxDisaster
Why'd you suddenly stop updating! Omg! WRITE MORE! w
1/8/2011 c13 7smurf-love
wow this is a change in werewolf stories i have read, keep up the good work i hope to read more in the future
10/30/2010 c13 happinie93
Wow! What an amazing story! I really like the plot. I think that it's so cool that Lucas can walk through objects! And I like the twist at the end of this chapter! Please update again soon!
8/28/2010 c13 Impatient
UPDATE! UPDATE!
8/24/2010 c2 cookiewolf
OMFG. oh noess...lol i love how everyone is oblivious to her real identity haha thorn is cool=)
8/24/2010 c1 cookiewolf
aw her dad is a bitch :C. aw i hoep she is ok=) great opeing chapter though C=
8/24/2010 c10 cookiewolf
HAHAH. i love her reaction 'oh' lol my immediate reaction would probaly to swear haha=) haha at jessica and the other bimbos. aw lucas is so cute:3 haha his mate?. thats not going to go down that well lol =)
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