
5/24/2015 c1
8theBatmanisShakakah
What I really love about this is the simplicity. You have achieved so much in so little words. I've seen a lot of second perspective and frankly I'm getting tired of it. Sometimes it can come across as pretentious and unnecessary. But in this oneshot - it's beautiful and you've done an excellent job. It brings life and enables me to feel sympathy and associate with the MC almost as though I AM the MC and I love that. I love that you can inspire such emotion. The description and flow of words is absolutely beautiful and I found myself reading sentences over again. Example: "the discomfort in the nuances of his facial expression points to impossibility." or "maybe you need to be able to shatter to appreciate the boy who will put you back together." and many others. I just wanted to tell you I loved it.

What I really love about this is the simplicity. You have achieved so much in so little words. I've seen a lot of second perspective and frankly I'm getting tired of it. Sometimes it can come across as pretentious and unnecessary. But in this oneshot - it's beautiful and you've done an excellent job. It brings life and enables me to feel sympathy and associate with the MC almost as though I AM the MC and I love that. I love that you can inspire such emotion. The description and flow of words is absolutely beautiful and I found myself reading sentences over again. Example: "the discomfort in the nuances of his facial expression points to impossibility." or "maybe you need to be able to shatter to appreciate the boy who will put you back together." and many others. I just wanted to tell you I loved it.
12/29/2014 c1 Guest
Ouch. This hurt. It hit the feelings head on. It was so relatable and beautiful and just... amazing. Fantastic work.
Ouch. This hurt. It hit the feelings head on. It was so relatable and beautiful and just... amazing. Fantastic work.
9/15/2014 c1 veryterry
It's always the little details that make a piece stand out: vodka-lined stomach, drumming hand on a surface, honest but inelegant. It's so raw and the emotions seep through this piece. I love it. You don't need to name people, or create backstories, because in this moment, 'you' and the boy can encompass everyone who's been in their situation. I thought the last sentence threw off the mood a little, but I suppose ending with the second to last sentence would've been a little too cynical ahaha.
It's always the little details that make a piece stand out: vodka-lined stomach, drumming hand on a surface, honest but inelegant. It's so raw and the emotions seep through this piece. I love it. You don't need to name people, or create backstories, because in this moment, 'you' and the boy can encompass everyone who's been in their situation. I thought the last sentence threw off the mood a little, but I suppose ending with the second to last sentence would've been a little too cynical ahaha.
9/14/2014 c1
1my princess ending
I love how instead of having the guy confess to the girl, you had the girl confess to the guy. At least I think it's a girl since the "you" is me and I am a girl. I've never quite been rejected like this before but I love the adjectives you use to describe the atmosphere between them. It seems as if the "you" really is me and I could practically hear my heart breaking while reading those words of rejection.
I felt the need to point out "Maybe you need to be able to shatter to appreciate the boy who will put you back together" because in a way, this is kind of true. In my eyes, I do think you'll appreciate him more in the beginning but after a while, I believe you'll end up loving him the same if you weren't rejected previously.

I love how instead of having the guy confess to the girl, you had the girl confess to the guy. At least I think it's a girl since the "you" is me and I am a girl. I've never quite been rejected like this before but I love the adjectives you use to describe the atmosphere between them. It seems as if the "you" really is me and I could practically hear my heart breaking while reading those words of rejection.
I felt the need to point out "Maybe you need to be able to shatter to appreciate the boy who will put you back together" because in a way, this is kind of true. In my eyes, I do think you'll appreciate him more in the beginning but after a while, I believe you'll end up loving him the same if you weren't rejected previously.
9/14/2014 c1 stuck in bed
Hi! Your story has been added to the Poetry category on A Drop Of Romeo :) Here's your review:
This gorgeously written one-shot manages to pack a punch with a mere 800 words. Through the effective use of second person, it’s all to easy to share the sentiments of a girl who professes her love to a boy. I think the title captures perfectly what the one-shot shows; a moment in which something is possible. But it’s just that: a moment, and it will pass even though ‘it will come again, I promise.’
Hi! Your story has been added to the Poetry category on A Drop Of Romeo :) Here's your review:
This gorgeously written one-shot manages to pack a punch with a mere 800 words. Through the effective use of second person, it’s all to easy to share the sentiments of a girl who professes her love to a boy. I think the title captures perfectly what the one-shot shows; a moment in which something is possible. But it’s just that: a moment, and it will pass even though ‘it will come again, I promise.’
12/17/2013 c1
75AlysonSerenaStone
Huh, this was a really good read! I think you did a wonderful time writing about heartbreak.

Huh, this was a really good read! I think you did a wonderful time writing about heartbreak.
9/3/2012 c1
9JuneSummers
Reading this made it seem like all my problems had melted away, fantastic writing as always. :D

Reading this made it seem like all my problems had melted away, fantastic writing as always. :D
1/20/2011 c1
5tickle.me.blue32
This is wow...just wow. I think everybody can relate to your story in some way. It was so beautiful and so true. You're an amazing writer and your work is usually underestimated. At least in my opinion. Anyways, you have some serious talent. And I'm not giving you a compliment, trust me. That's the truth.

This is wow...just wow. I think everybody can relate to your story in some way. It was so beautiful and so true. You're an amazing writer and your work is usually underestimated. At least in my opinion. Anyways, you have some serious talent. And I'm not giving you a compliment, trust me. That's the truth.
5/1/2010 c1
1Electric Colours
This made me teary for a little because this basically describes what i would love to do but have no courage to do so. Your writing is just so beautiful and real and I can relate with it on so many levels. Which kind of scares me to tell the truth, but its still amazing.
And yes, it is possible. Definitely.
x x

This made me teary for a little because this basically describes what i would love to do but have no courage to do so. Your writing is just so beautiful and real and I can relate with it on so many levels. Which kind of scares me to tell the truth, but its still amazing.
And yes, it is possible. Definitely.
x x
4/30/2010 c1
6letyoursoultakeflight
For the first time in your life you have allowed yourself to be vulnerable, and the fallout is a special kind of humiliating
- just one more reason why I love reading your writing!

For the first time in your life you have allowed yourself to be vulnerable, and the fallout is a special kind of humiliating
- just one more reason why I love reading your writing!
4/29/2010 c1
41chewychester
That second to last line got me. I would have said it without the maybe, but I think it sounds cold. Next time..., because there won't be any heart there to break, right?

That second to last line got me. I would have said it without the maybe, but I think it sounds cold. Next time..., because there won't be any heart there to break, right?