for Moonlit Cinema10/16/2010 c1 Writing-Is-Fun
So... Expceptions are kind of gray skinned people that are really tall, and have silver eyes. Honora she is a new human who has great resistance to aging and other diseases right? I don't think I got her first name. Wait is her name Honora Bryleigh? I know the one bully is Evander Lewiston and I know of the other exceptions. But you really need to give the main character's name clearer. I think that's my input for this story. Otherwise it seems okay.
So... Expceptions are kind of gray skinned people that are really tall, and have silver eyes. Honora she is a new human who has great resistance to aging and other diseases right? I don't think I got her first name. Wait is her name Honora Bryleigh? I know the one bully is Evander Lewiston and I know of the other exceptions. But you really need to give the main character's name clearer. I think that's my input for this story. Otherwise it seems okay.
10/16/2010 c1 
2Elsbeth Lagrange
I hope you keep going with this story. You have some interesting concepts, though sometimes I find your sentence structure a bit hard to follow- the first sentence was especially tough, but then, the first line is always hard to nail down, isn't it? I found your classroom descriptions easy to relate to, and I can visualize the Exceptions very clearly.
2Elsbeth LagrangeI hope you keep going with this story. You have some interesting concepts, though sometimes I find your sentence structure a bit hard to follow- the first sentence was especially tough, but then, the first line is always hard to nail down, isn't it? I found your classroom descriptions easy to relate to, and I can visualize the Exceptions very clearly.