10/27/2011 c2 Kitty Howell
I wonder what it was about her that really stuck with him. Her fire, not being swept off her feet, or her honesty. Or perhaps a combination? She certainty doesn't seem like the type of girls he's usually around. Which is defiantly good.

It's kinda cute to see McHale so...flustered? He probably isn't used to that, and it isn't what I imagined for him being a playboy and all. It's adorable :D

I am loving these chapter quotes you're doing. I don't write for this website often, more so for fanfiction. I may start doing them myself. As long as you don't mind it, of course, lol.

And I see her fire is still there! I'm loving it. :D

10/26/2011 c40 1leavesfallingup
This was truly an excellent read. I read it straight through, clicking Next as soon as I reached the end of each chapter; so I did not give you the chapter-by-chapter review that your story deserved.

Perhaps later I will go back and re-read it and make up for that omission.

Great story.

LFU

10/6/2011 c6 akaCHEEKS
Apparently me and Marissa (who, by the way, is my personal assistant; don't ask, I don't get it either) are going to an underground burlesque

I think what you're looking for is this little sign: "-" I don't know exactly know what they're called but I do know that you use them for whenever someone is speaking but introduced a new topic in between their sentences. Like when they cut themselves off, go on tangent and then go back to their original topic.

For example it should have been "Apparently Marissa and I-who by the way is my personal assistant; don't ask, I don't get it either-are going to an underground burlesque group..."

I also fixed your comma mistake there if you notice. and Marissa and I unless you want to keep her speaking voice dominant and write the way she speaks then keep it as "me and Marissa".

9/12/2011 c1 UbiquityEssence
Lovely story !

7/19/2011 c9 19Eternal Skies
I know how the rain can feel liberating. Last time it rained -months ago : P- I just went out and started doing all crazy hooligan crap. I was soaked through but I didn't give two shits about it or the fact that I might've caught a cold, all I was feeling was pure bliss and happiness. So corny but true.

I'm not sure about the pacing, it seems like Chris is getting attached to her fast and now I'm wondering if he's just starting to like her that way because she

s basically refreshing or because he can be himself with her or both. Still, I liked how Chris just let go and tried to have fun. It shows that he doesn't really choose to be thos brooding guy and that the people around him are the ones that are actually restricting..

7/19/2011 c2 Eternal Skies
I can't believe you don't have like a hundred or three hundred reviews because this is one of the most mature stories I've read on FP. The narrator is a little professional-sounding, which comes off as somehow emotionally dettached, but it (narrator) serves purely as a storyteller in the fashion 'tell it like it is' though a little humor or insight would've been a pretty neutralizing element to add to your narration :)

I totally loved how genuine and believable McHale's interest-slash-attraction to Andie was. It's perfectly realistic, unlike some other stories that drive me up a wall as I wonder why the lead guy is even interested in the lead girl.

Anyway, I only read like two chapters so I don't want be quick to judge but I kind of alreay did that ;P

6/14/2011 c40 15Ice Bubble
OMG! This story was soooooo cute! I actually prefer it to The Four Sides Of A Triangle or something like that. *bad memory regarding names*

This summer, I want to read all of your uploaded work! 3