for Boys and Their Demon8/24/2019 c1 wallawallabingbang
Well that sucks its been takin down since I was here last. Fingers crossed it comes back I guess :/
Well that sucks its been takin down since I was here last. Fingers crossed it comes back I guess :/
4/3/2019 c1 Baihumon17
Aaaaaahhhhh!
not a troll review, but a reaction to how long it's been and that this is gone.
That is all, thank you.
Aaaaaahhhhh!
not a troll review, but a reaction to how long it's been and that this is gone.
That is all, thank you.
12/18/2014 c1 Stressed Fan
Well I just spent a good portion of my night looking for this story and then when I finally find it, I am graced with a author's note that says the story is going to be redone. This would not be a problem if the message had not been from over a year ago. I will keep this bookmarked and check back, but seriously you should have just left the original up and then made a separate story that mentioned in some form that the story was a rewrite. This really sucks, if you ever go back to this site, just post the original please.
Well I just spent a good portion of my night looking for this story and then when I finally find it, I am graced with a author's note that says the story is going to be redone. This would not be a problem if the message had not been from over a year ago. I will keep this bookmarked and check back, but seriously you should have just left the original up and then made a separate story that mentioned in some form that the story was a rewrite. This really sucks, if you ever go back to this site, just post the original please.
8/8/2014 c1 spottedfire98
I know you took this story down for construction, but its been a very long time since then. Personally, I enjoyed the first version and would like to read it again, but cant since you took it down. Please put it up until you finish the new version :)
I know you took this story down for construction, but its been a very long time since then. Personally, I enjoyed the first version and would like to read it again, but cant since you took it down. Please put it up until you finish the new version :)
8/27/2013 c1 
1Menn
NO WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT! At least have it up with a "REDONE" in the title and a link! The idea of facing your old works shows you are not afraid to see that you needed work!
AWWWW It would have been nice to see how much you improved.
1MennNO WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT! At least have it up with a "REDONE" in the title and a link! The idea of facing your old works shows you are not afraid to see that you needed work!
AWWWW It would have been nice to see how much you improved.
8/2/2013 c21 deno
loved it
loved it
6/23/2013 c21 Guest
This story is fantastic
This story is fantastic
5/20/2013 c21 Syta
Loved the story. It was so refreshing. The un-cliche plot was amazing. I really would like to read more about Jake, Brian & the baby.
Loved the story. It was so refreshing. The un-cliche plot was amazing. I really would like to read more about Jake, Brian & the baby.
9/9/2012 c21 1Aheen Anna
Grrr! I like it but now you speech of making it better and im torn between wanting more, or wishing i hadn't read it so i could read the longer one! Ugh! And ya know leaving it off with his ending up pregnet reallllly is a cruel cliff hanger. GREAT stoey otherwise!
1Aheen AnnaGrrr! I like it but now you speech of making it better and im torn between wanting more, or wishing i hadn't read it so i could read the longer one! Ugh! And ya know leaving it off with his ending up pregnet reallllly is a cruel cliff hanger. GREAT stoey otherwise!
7/9/2012 c21 Ponce de Leon
well, it was...decent?
i absolutely hated Jake's character at the start, i thought it was going it was going to be a typical mary sue that everyone is supposed love and they have so more powerful than anyone else.
several characters were introduced spontaneously, with little leading up to them.
no characters except jake and brian went through any growth, and as for jake and brian, they development was like a coin flip. also, jake had little to no discernible flaws, thats a bad thing. he went through no development other than "oh, i hated this guy, now i love him" and he was constantly victimized as if everything was another characters fault through the entire story. his ability to control ivan and brian in their wolf forms was never explained. and we never actually got to see him use any of his alleged abilities. Also, cory came out of Fucking Nowhere, Utah, and suddenly is ivan's love interest. and really only existed to be that, hades' involvement was completely out of left field, and most of them events that happened were made up on the spot, like Zeus having to go to a council or something THAT WE KNOW NOTHING ABOUT, if Jake was as close with them as you say he is, why did they never contact him or tell him anything of relevance.
Pacing, you honestly think that some readers are just going to accept the fact that nothing happened in those giant time skips? and if something did happen, that you can just give a two second explanation of it and not bring it up.
all in all, i would just say if plan on continuing this: CHARACTERS FLAWS MAKE THEM INTERESTING. Pacing: it adds consistency, and is more interesting than "4 months later, this happened, also, this happened in the four months" Actually go into detail about what happened in those four months. Characters need actual introductions and reasoning. Remove plotholes such as why zeus never thought it was relevant to mention that a long-extinct race is coming back to life and the subplot between ivan and jake that abrupty ended when cory came along.
Just please re-write this, it needs it so badly.
well, it was...decent?
i absolutely hated Jake's character at the start, i thought it was going it was going to be a typical mary sue that everyone is supposed love and they have so more powerful than anyone else.
several characters were introduced spontaneously, with little leading up to them.
no characters except jake and brian went through any growth, and as for jake and brian, they development was like a coin flip. also, jake had little to no discernible flaws, thats a bad thing. he went through no development other than "oh, i hated this guy, now i love him" and he was constantly victimized as if everything was another characters fault through the entire story. his ability to control ivan and brian in their wolf forms was never explained. and we never actually got to see him use any of his alleged abilities. Also, cory came out of Fucking Nowhere, Utah, and suddenly is ivan's love interest. and really only existed to be that, hades' involvement was completely out of left field, and most of them events that happened were made up on the spot, like Zeus having to go to a council or something THAT WE KNOW NOTHING ABOUT, if Jake was as close with them as you say he is, why did they never contact him or tell him anything of relevance.
Pacing, you honestly think that some readers are just going to accept the fact that nothing happened in those giant time skips? and if something did happen, that you can just give a two second explanation of it and not bring it up.
all in all, i would just say if plan on continuing this: CHARACTERS FLAWS MAKE THEM INTERESTING. Pacing: it adds consistency, and is more interesting than "4 months later, this happened, also, this happened in the four months" Actually go into detail about what happened in those four months. Characters need actual introductions and reasoning. Remove plotholes such as why zeus never thought it was relevant to mention that a long-extinct race is coming back to life and the subplot between ivan and jake that abrupty ended when cory came along.
Just please re-write this, it needs it so badly.
11/26/2011 c1 Bumblebee
I usually don't like giving a short review. But, exeception, for this:
Maylene is spoiled bitch, who needs extra protection from daddy.
Period
That's big, coming from me. By the way, this story is great, except for the above :D
I usually don't like giving a short review. But, exeception, for this:
Maylene is spoiled bitch, who needs extra protection from daddy.
Period
That's big, coming from me. By the way, this story is great, except for the above :D
10/31/2011 c21 3alexisrenee
Focking amazing! I absolutely fucking LOVE this story! I do think it's a little short, but I still completely LOOOOOVE it!
3alexisreneeFocking amazing! I absolutely fucking LOVE this story! I do think it's a little short, but I still completely LOOOOOVE it!
8/12/2011 c21 Random
... Awesome... Captivated from the start. Usually I'd suggest small things that you could think about but even with the slight and I mean slight inconstancies in flow I enjoyed every minute of it... though the ending seemed a little fast, the euphoria of love came too fast after realising his hurt... the progress was a tad rushed.
... Awesome... Captivated from the start. Usually I'd suggest small things that you could think about but even with the slight and I mean slight inconstancies in flow I enjoyed every minute of it... though the ending seemed a little fast, the euphoria of love came too fast after realising his hurt... the progress was a tad rushed.
8/12/2011 c21 2NormaJean Beausoleil
loved this story. great job. i wish there was an epilogue, but i'll take what i can get. thanks for sharing!
2NormaJean Beausoleilloved this story. great job. i wish there was an epilogue, but i'll take what i can get. thanks for sharing!
7/4/2011 c21 Xandrea
i loved this story. I read it in like 4 hours. I would have reviewd more chapters but I was reading it on my phone and its a little hard to type out a reiview on it. haha. you are an amzing writer. the story did seem rushed in parts but it was still great. I mean yeah there were parts that i thought could have been added to or made lobger but as you've already said youre going to come back and revise it at some point and trust me i will definitely re-read it when you do. Dont ever stop writing. you are amazing at it. Thank you so much for sharing this wonderful story with us. :)
i loved this story. I read it in like 4 hours. I would have reviewd more chapters but I was reading it on my phone and its a little hard to type out a reiview on it. haha. you are an amzing writer. the story did seem rushed in parts but it was still great. I mean yeah there were parts that i thought could have been added to or made lobger but as you've already said youre going to come back and revise it at some point and trust me i will definitely re-read it when you do. Dont ever stop writing. you are amazing at it. Thank you so much for sharing this wonderful story with us. :)