
3/31/2011 c1
105qubed
i like, in the first stanza, how the last line left me wondering if he took a bite out of the narrator's leg. very subtle.
and that is a magical last line to sum up your concept.
if you even call it that.
bravo.

i like, in the first stanza, how the last line left me wondering if he took a bite out of the narrator's leg. very subtle.
and that is a magical last line to sum up your concept.
if you even call it that.
bravo.
3/19/2011 c1
29YasuRan
Courtesy of the Review Marathon (link in my profile)
The first stanza was an excellent hook to draw the reader in, what with the scornful tone put across by 'he' and the imagery of 'feasting' juxtaposed with the meat he tears into. The one that follows also illuminates (excuse the pun) the rigidness of his opinions which the narrator finds most discomforting.
I can easily relate to the desperate tone that seeps through the wording of the next few stanzas, especially the comparisons to the endless well of holy water and the feeling of rejuvenation one feels on listening to the workings of the earth. In fact, I think this is one allusion any author can relate to as well. It's the perfect metaphor for a writer in love with his/her craft.

Courtesy of the Review Marathon (link in my profile)
The first stanza was an excellent hook to draw the reader in, what with the scornful tone put across by 'he' and the imagery of 'feasting' juxtaposed with the meat he tears into. The one that follows also illuminates (excuse the pun) the rigidness of his opinions which the narrator finds most discomforting.
I can easily relate to the desperate tone that seeps through the wording of the next few stanzas, especially the comparisons to the endless well of holy water and the feeling of rejuvenation one feels on listening to the workings of the earth. In fact, I think this is one allusion any author can relate to as well. It's the perfect metaphor for a writer in love with his/her craft.
2/1/2011 c1
1Ram Attra
This is great I like the way you set it up.
PS could you read my story? continue.

This is great I like the way you set it up.
PS could you read my story? continue.
2/1/2011 c1
1k+Faithless Juliet
This is very good. I loved the abstract nature and the slices of imagery. Also loved the ending. Great job here, keep up the good work.
Much love,
Juliet.

This is very good. I loved the abstract nature and the slices of imagery. Also loved the ending. Great job here, keep up the good work.
Much love,
Juliet.