for When It's Over5/26/2011 c1 
1Souffle Girl
Oh, wow. This was so sad. :(
But I really liked it. The emotion is almost palpable throughout the piece! I also loved how you managed to write such a moving, sad, desperate story in less than 1000 words.
1Souffle GirlOh, wow. This was so sad. :(
But I really liked it. The emotion is almost palpable throughout the piece! I also loved how you managed to write such a moving, sad, desperate story in less than 1000 words.
3/26/2011 c1 4Iva Hartnet
Oh wow. That broke my heart :(
Lovely. I loved the desperation that came through in the story. I loved the reality of the situation. And I felt honest sympathy for your characters. They get lost in their own lives and lose each other in the process. It's so sad...
I really enjoyed it.
I loved your character portrayal. Beautiful. Honestly. The story was so simple. But it was ingenious in its simplicity. Really. I have no praises left for it now :P
4Iva HartnetOh wow. That broke my heart :(
Lovely. I loved the desperation that came through in the story. I loved the reality of the situation. And I felt honest sympathy for your characters. They get lost in their own lives and lose each other in the process. It's so sad...
I really enjoyed it.
I loved your character portrayal. Beautiful. Honestly. The story was so simple. But it was ingenious in its simplicity. Really. I have no praises left for it now :P
3/18/2011 c1 Superslow Jellyfish
Wow, it was short, but definitely to the point. I liked how the lyrics were integrated within the prompt, making it relevant to the two characters and their mutual dissatisfaction withing their failed marriage, so putting in the lyrics made it work even more so.
Another thing I liked about this story was the narration and symbolism tied in. James had Jax to keep him company since Chloe and him drifted apart. He took up smoking, sort of became a monotonous hermit, and all of them seem to be themes within the story, the dog as a symbol of loyalty, which his wife now lost and the cigarettes as a need to have something close by, judging by the reoccurance of those matters, Chloe doesn't like either, but her own symbolism instead of the cigarettes is the need to work. I very much enjoyed reading this.
The tone was consistent and fluid, of general sadness and loss, even the way Chloe acted was in this such manner at the very end when she hands him the divorce papers and he easily complies, which is a third thing I liked from the story. Makes the whole ten years seem wasted, and to me, nothing is sadder than a waste of time.
BM (Flare) from the Review Game
Wow, it was short, but definitely to the point. I liked how the lyrics were integrated within the prompt, making it relevant to the two characters and their mutual dissatisfaction withing their failed marriage, so putting in the lyrics made it work even more so.
Another thing I liked about this story was the narration and symbolism tied in. James had Jax to keep him company since Chloe and him drifted apart. He took up smoking, sort of became a monotonous hermit, and all of them seem to be themes within the story, the dog as a symbol of loyalty, which his wife now lost and the cigarettes as a need to have something close by, judging by the reoccurance of those matters, Chloe doesn't like either, but her own symbolism instead of the cigarettes is the need to work. I very much enjoyed reading this.
The tone was consistent and fluid, of general sadness and loss, even the way Chloe acted was in this such manner at the very end when she hands him the divorce papers and he easily complies, which is a third thing I liked from the story. Makes the whole ten years seem wasted, and to me, nothing is sadder than a waste of time.
BM (Flare) from the Review Game