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8/2/2011 c11 41chewychester
Fierce words! Do I have to read the next chapter under the covers? *Worries over war*
6/6/2011 c10 1swamp13
i like it, please update soon (:
5/23/2011 c9 41chewychester
Alright, you may leave us in a lurch and lost at sea, but just don't hang us up to dry for 6 months, please! What an ending, WOW
4/22/2011 c8 4Garneau
Hi,

I just read the reviews I wrote you early. I am so so sorry about how many mistakes they are. I'm sorry if they didn't make sense, I was reviewing on my ipod and the spell check sort of took over and changed my words.

Anyway, hope it will be clearer next time when I review,

So please bring on another chapter!

Garneau.
4/15/2011 c3 PJ Draft
Again, I salute you for deicating time to expand upon Sookie's character and her relationship with our main protag Steph. I just want to point out that your writing is very lovely and not overwroght with "filler" as I like to call it. Most lines are essential and not bogged down. You place the a good amount of discription in along with emotion. Wonderful. Anyways, I have to go so I will read & review the rest when I have time. (If I forget feel free to PM me and remind me. Sometimes I read and forget to review.) Anyways, in the meantime, I would love for you to check out my stories as well if they intrest you. They are not as poslished as this though. I skiped ahead to your A/N as the 8th chapter. I understand about the labtop situation. Good luck with that. When mine crashed and burned, I got a techy friend to retrevie the files. If it isn't a harddrive problem than you might have a chance to get at least some files back if you take it to the right people. -PJ
4/15/2011 c2 PJ Draft
What did they go to NYC for? I live twenty mins away and I hate it... I do loathe the smog, people, and choking skyscrapers... Okay they live there. Visiting parents, are they in college? You clear this up later on. (I just noticed I confused Steph with the guy. Opps. I'm not good with names. Excuse that.)I do love Sookie and Steph's relationship, I kind of feel like many of the romance stories on the site forget the fact that us girls need our best girlfriends to help us through the difficulties of the world. I am glad you have set out the time to foster that. I like the last line. Lovely imagery. I did enjoy this so far. :D -PJ
4/15/2011 c1 PJ Draft
Taylor Swift huh? *plays swift in background* Songwriting is a whole nother ball game. They use microphones and auto tune instead of the usual pen and keyboard. :) Since you mention in your A/N that personal connection you wish to emulate in your craft, I will keep special attention to that aspect for criticism. When you sent me an e-mail request to review some of your writing I was flattered you think I'm knowledgeable. Alas I am not. I am an aspiring writer with flawed work as well. :D But as a reader, I can give my comments. I kind of blurt things out, but I will be truthful. (Not harsh, but truthful. That's just my style) Anyways, on to my comments:

Instant hook right in the first line. I have a personal love of metaphors and poetic (Is poetic the right word?) Hmm. Well, basically I like great ideas. The boomerang of fate is a clever concept, hope you expand upon it. (I hope steph is not the metaphoric boomerang though. I hate those kind of guys) Steph falls into my absent from story annoying broody character. Let's see if you can redeem him to my well graces in the later chapters, but at the moment it reminds me of middle school melodrama. I can relate to this. (Not of a betrayal of a guy but rather a best friend who went and upped pulled this game of sending the messenger. I wanted to shoot the messenger.) I do like the reflection at the end where I sense a tinge of regret for not doing anything about it. Lovely, prologue. Off to chapter 1.

-PJ
4/3/2011 c7 1swamp13
(: please update soon
3/30/2011 c7 4Garneau
The closeing line of this chapter was sublime.

Ive noticed it wig all your chapters. You end in a such a way that returns back gothic inner turmoil of the protagonist.

I definitely wanting to read abou this long awaited dinner,

Garneau.
3/30/2011 c6 Garneau
I like how the fact your keep some things an enigma. For instance what happened with the mysterious him and Allison.

Looking forward to more

Garneau.
3/30/2011 c5 Garneau
I really like this idea of goon back to where it all began, her roots, her haunted history.

It is exciting to see she has finally seen some from her childhood days. Especially icant wait for their reaction to her new found fame.

Very excited.

Also your author's note at the start of this story had me wandering. Is this based on your own reality?

If it is, there is a definite sense of honesty that colours your words. If it isn't, I am very impressed by your writing skills!

Garneau.
3/30/2011 c4 Garneau
I really like Sookie as a character.

I can definitely see her as a source of light and positivity in this story.

I also liked how you wrote her idea of essentials. It was a nice touch.

Garneau.
3/30/2011 c3 Garneau
Hey,

I really like the quotes you put at the start of the chapters.

In so many other stories, the quotes don't make sense or seem to apply with what actually happens, but yours really work.

As for the parents, in this chapter they seem rather harmless.

I have the feeling it's all a facade.

On to the net chapter,

Garneau.
3/30/2011 c2 Garneau
Absolutely loved this chapter.

The thig about your writing is that it is so raw and honest, you know?

I read your opening authors note and I get the feeling you use reality to write this. Whatever it is, it certainly works for you.

Just out of interest, I just wonder what Steph's parents did for her to dislike them so much. You described their characteristics really well, but I didn't really see how steph could hate them so. Perhaps you might have a memory later on of what it was. I will have to read and find out. (but not until tomorrow cos I've really got to get to sleep!)

Garneau.
3/30/2011 c1 Garneau
Hey,

That was a really well written first chapter.

Your metaphor in the summary is a bit cheesy but that's probably just me. I am a big fan and abuser of metaphors and I really liked the idea of the boomerang and it always coming back -

But you do realize that boomerangs were used as weapons to kill for food?

I'm just kidding (actually that's a true fact) I really loved your use of the idea,

Can't wait to read more,

Garneau.
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